Iím not usually the type of guy who likes to share personal details about himself with anyone, but Iíve already talked a little bit about my depression
, so Iím just going to say this and deal with the repercussions: Iím bisexual. Iím attracted to both men and women. It scares the hell out of me to finally admit that in a public forum because Iíve seen what others have had to deal with. Iíve seen the hatred directed at homosexuals and transgender people on the internet. Iíve heard people tell my brother, a homosexual, that heís ďgoing to hellĒ or heís ďdisgusting.Ē
My brother and I were raised right smack dab in the middle of the Bible Belt, and yet we somehow wound up avoiding some of the more ignorant ideals that some of the people in our lives attempted to pound into our heads. We were fortunate enough to always have my mother around. My mom will tell you herself that she wasnít the best parent in history or anything, but she did try, and she always let my brother and me make up our own minds about things. She always told us she would love us no matter what and she still says so now. I believed her then and I still believe her now[font=arial].[/font]
I was raised a Christian and Iíll always remain one no matter what for my own reasons. I believe in God. Iíve read the Bible, including those verses about homosexuality that some of the more grating members of the religious community like to tout. The Bible has been twisted and turned by the modern church into something that it is quite frankly not, which is one of the main reasons, along with judgmental idiots, that I havenít regularly attended a church in years. All the ones Iíve attempted to attend have been borderline Westboro, so my relationship with them didnít last too long.
I suspect now I wonít be welcome in very many religious circles at all, which is just fine by me because I donít want to be around terrible people. I was affected by their crumminess before, but now Iím desensitized to it and donít really care anymore. Iím happy to know that their death rattle will soon be drowned out by the winds of change. And Iím even happier knowing those winds are also sweeping over the thing I love most: video games.
Now, Iíll be the first to admit that I love me some Call of Duty
.† Iím also a huge fan of plenty of other AAA titles, among them BioShock Infinite
,† Grand Theft Auto V
,† Halo 4
† and Assassinís Creed IV: Black Flag
.† Now that Iím in danger of being labeled a ďdudebroĒ, I would also like to point out that one of my favorite games is Brothers: A Tale of Two Sons
† and Iíve also completed and love games such as Papers, Please
,† Analogue: A Hate Story
,† Depression Quest
† and Device 6
,† as well as many other ďindieĒ games. I like to shake things up and I very much enjoy when new experiences are made available.
However, the gaming world just hasnít gotten enough of those new experiences. Developers still believe that having a female protagonist in their games is a bad business decision because a bunch of losers get on Reddit and say it is. Death rattle. A Twine game isnít a game. Death rattle. Social activism shouldnít be in games. Death rattle.
I want more games that challenge the traditional idea of what a game is. I want a first-person shooter featuring a chain-smoking grandmother. I want a game that allows me to feel just a little bit of what itís like to be a single mother raising three children. I want a survival horror game about an overweight bisexual male whoís constantly depressed and struggling with his religion and afraid to admit heís bisexual.
The main thing I want is change. I want to see it in games and in humanity. Some people would seek to deny me and others that change. It doesnít matter. Their time is over. Death rattle upon death rattle fading into nothingness. Let the winds of change sweep through and make things right.