Ok you Primitive Screwheads, listen up! You see this? This... is not my Turning Point gaming rig! A 6-year old, 2.49 Ghz Pentium 4 Hewlett-Packard desktop. S-Mart's bottom-to-near-bottom of the line. You can find this in the home electronics department. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan, maybe. Retails for about $109.95. It's got a DVD burner, cobalt blue steel, and a 1 gig of RAM. That's right. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart. You got that?
So, Blindside Dork beat me too the Gambit news, but I still got something for ya, I swear!
Looks like Ryan Reynolds has taken a small role as that wise-cracking mercenary with the mangled face, Deadpool! Evidently Reynolds is a hardcore Deadpool fan and had said months ago that he would "forgo anything" to play Deadpool in some form. Well, he got his wish. Again, it is supposed to be a small role, but one that could possibly set Deadpool up for his own movie, as Marvel is doing more to set up character cross-ups now that they have more say-so in the final outcomes. You know Sam Jackson is playing Nick Fury in Iron Man, but did you know that Iron Man will be appearing in The Incredible Hulk? Awesome, huh?
Not only that, but Will.I.Am of the Black-Eyed Peas will have some sort of cameo role in Woverine movie AND the Blob will make an appearance.
Dr. Greg Snyder, a psychologist at Omaha's Children's Hospital who has never seen a "Tom & Jerry" cartoon, offers this piece of overblown common knowledge:
"Exposure to violent video games, even E rated video games, increases aggressive thoughts, increases pro-social behavior and increases general arousal"
Wait, wait, what was that? "Pro-social behavior"? That sounds like a good thing. Let's discuss that.
"Prosocial behavior occurs when someone acts to help another person, particularly when they have no goal other than to help a fellow human."
Wow. Okay, so video games elevate my barely-contained blood lust to feverish levels while compelling me to love and help my fellow people. It sounds like the brain is stimulated, and maybe I'm not used to that! "General arousal," indeed.
Researches from a variety of important sounding universities and health institutes have of course conducted a bunch of crazy experiments where they closely monitor the intensity of the little light bulb that appears above your head when you think about violent video games, and they generally agree that exposure to violent video games makes teenagers respond less intensely to real (videotaped) violence. They have a lower heart rate and lower galvanic skin response after viewing, meaning that violence has been "normalized" to them, according to Sissyboy Snyder. The ability to stay calm in the face of violence is truly a horrible thing... I guess?
"The more normal it is, the more likely it is they're going to activate or engage in those behaviors when provoked or even unprovoked," Snyder said.
Man, Snyder is a fucking idiot, as evidenced in this beautifully constructed retort from Tyler White, age 17. "With a shooting game, you can't actually go out and shoot someone," White said.
You can't? These past 20 something years of gaming have led me to believe I was put on this earth to SLAY mortal man! Also, guitars are operated using five colorful buttons and squirrels are foul-mouth drunks that can use their tails like helicopter propellers. THAT is the reality I know. The article at least adds that White and his 16-year old friend said that they did not feel more violent after playing Gears of War for about 20 minutes.
Look, I'm not denying that video games probably slightly elevate your desire to be violent, but that's normal, and dare I say it's probably healthy? How many people here saw the "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" movie when they were younger, screamed "Cowabunga!" and karate kicked their little brother in the face? I know I did. That's normal. It's what people do. It's part of growing up, part of developing socially, and part of showing your little brother who's the fucking ninja master of the house. It does not mean Ninja Turtles were a warmongering demon sent from Hell to destroy the world.
I'm having trouble wrapping this up in a meaningful way, so I will leave you with this brilliant thought from Chuck Payne, a man who does not censor what his child plays, but imposes a time limit to his son's murder-simulator exposure:
"Then, when they're done playing, that's all that's on their mind. Kill. Kill. Kill. Well, one hour a day. Period."
Like a horrible, baby-mutilating, burning train-wreck you just can't turn away from, the G.I. Joe film is somehow impossible for me to ignore.
News from the producer confirms the presence of Destro who is pretty much guaranteed to have some sort of accent (Scottish or not is yet to be determined). Also confirmed are Zartan and Hawk
The producer also confirms the presence of a character who in early drafts of the script becomes... COBRA COMMANDER?
Jay Allard and Major Nelson called Brian Crescente on PSP Skype screaming drunk and said Castle Crashers is coming out in 3 WEEKS and that it is going to be FREEEEEE because we had to endure a "royal clusterfuck of XBL bullshit" this month (their words, not mine). Call Workman if you don't believe it!
Marlon Wayans has been cast to play Ripchord, new leader of the JOEs, in the upcoming film. Enjoy this copy pasta:
"According to Variety, Ripcord is now the leader of the Joes. While there's no mention of traditional Joe leaders such as Duke, Hawk or Flint being in the Stephen Sommers-directed film, the trade paper adds that Joseph Gordon-Levitt (Brick, The Lookout) is also in negotiations to join the project in an undisclosed role.
In the comics, Ripcord (a.k.a. Ohio native Wallace A. Weems) is a HALO (high altitude-low opening) jumper.
Variety also reveals that G.I. Joe will be set 10 years in the future. Filming begins next month in Los Angeles for an Aug. 7, 2009 release.
Marlon Wayans' credits include Little Man, Scary Movie, Scary Movie 2,Dungeons & Dragons, Norbit, The Ladykillers, and Requiem for a Dream."
How does this goofy bastard keep finding high profile work? Link Below:
PROTIP:
I just recently got approved for an Amazon credit card, and if they're still running the promo, they credit your first purchase $30. I just bought COD4 new for $9.98 after shipping, and you may be able to as well! SW33T!
Alright boys and girls, if you're a Ron Paul supporter, today is the day you dig deep and donate what you can to help make history, and if you're not, you're welcome to watch history in the making!
The previous record held for for most presidential campaign fundraising online in a single day is held by Ron Paul, when supporters of freedom donated over 4.3 million dollars in 24 hours in honor of Guy Fawkes Day.
Today's date is an equally important date in the history of freedom and defiance. On this day, 1773, the Sons of Liberty led by Samuel Adams protested unfair trade practice and unscrupulous government intervention by dumping over 40 tons of valuable British tea into the Boston Harbor. This action is widely recognized as a catalyst to the American Revolution, and has inspired countless important activists and reform leaders throughout modern history.
Today is Tea Party '07, the day when believers in liberty and freedom put their money where their mouths are and pony up a few bucks to help ensure that our nation does not continue along the hellbound path to collapse that we are faced with today.
Politics as usual can not get the job done. It's time for a revolution! Revolt, and spare some of that hard earned cash to get the job done.
Not only will your donations help pay to get the word out, but the simple act of shattering the record that we set only a little over a month ago will help get our dark horse the exposure that he both deserves and desperately needs as it comes down to the wire.
I dropped a hundred bucks today, and I don't have money to throw around. What can you spare for the prospect of liberty and a new republic? There are men and women overseas giving their lives for less right now. Spare some dollar bills.
Pop music loving closet goth moonlighting as a heavy metal crusader. I have the CD collection of a serial killer, and, ladies, I know how to rock a 5-button Gibson. Watch out!
UMK 3 makes me smash things.
