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Meet the destructoid Team >>   Bob Muir
Bob Muir's blog
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Bob has been hanging around ModernMethod for years and and somehow writes almost everywhere, including Japanator and Flixist. He was once lit on fire, but it's not as cool as you'd think.

I remember being in here a lot:


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Necros Says: After a brief hiatus, Rantoid is back, and just in time for the holidays. I'm going to claim that releasing tonight's installment on a Sunday was intentional so it would coincide with the day before Christmas Eve and not because I've been too busy with sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll to type up something thoughtful. Anyone who says otherwise gets coal in their stocking. Be forewarned, tonight's Rantoid is somewhat different from the usual fare.

Unbeknownst to me while enduring the final days of my fall semester, it is that time of year again, the time when people spend buckets of money on temporary decorations and stores switch their background music to "poorly-written holiday tunes," infuriating anyone with good taste in music. Thankfully, my university manages to only lightly suggest the holiday season, perhaps opting not to forcefully shove good cheer down our throats. However, the lack of constant reminders that Santa is coming actually made me completely forget about appropriating gifts for my family to enjoy (besides bringing Wii Sports back home). For me, this meant a wild scramble but one week before the sacred celebration/marketing event of the year.

I soon remembered my days as a wide-eyed, less cynical kid, and how it didn't seem to be so much work back then. Gifts for my family was something I barely had to think about, and they always seemed happy for anything. Similarly, the gifts that I received were always "just what I wanted." It was Christmas, and the idea of a bunch of gifts was too good to find fault in some of the goods.

Confession time: when I was young, I didn't have video games, not a single one. My parents, trying to be responsible, encouraged me to play with toys and regular games and do horrible activities like going outside. I got most of my early gaming in at friend's houses. So since all video games were a Nintendo at the time in my parents' eyes, I probably should have foreseen the incident I'm about to relate.

My parents would take us to a couple of stores like Toys 'R' Us around Thanksgiving to make up a wish list for Santa. My sister and I would rove the isles like wild dogs, pulling out toys and games to put on the list, then promptly forgetting about them the moment they were written down. However, I'll never forget my first experience with the Nintendo 64. There it was, a giant screen with a strange controller coming out of it, and the most beautiful game I had ever seen before: Super Mario 64. At first, I was overwhelmed at the concept of moving in a 3D space, but I soon found the hang of it. I was distracted from my wish list creation for at least half an hour, not even playing any of the levels, just jumping around the castle courtyard. I knew that I had to have this for Christmas. And so, onto the wish list it went. However, since young kids these days are all ADD, I forgot about the must-have game and system within a few days.

Christmas finally rolled around, and all the usual festivities of the night before ran their course. I woke up to see what Santa had brought me and was overjoyed to find...a Sega Game Gear with five games, already unpackaged! Oh boy, this was the best Christmas ever! With the N64 completely out of my mind, I joyfully started playing, not even the fact that there were no manuals for anything deterring me.

In retrospect, I can certainly imagine what happened. My parents, knowing only that I wanted "some video game," had walked into a used game store and went for something that wasn't too expensive: the failing Sega Game Gear. In deciding what games to pick, they picked what they thought would be good: a token Sonic game, a Ren and Stimpy game, a football game, a soccer game, and a baseball game. When asking why the used games didn't have any manuals, they were told that "kids like to figure it out on their own," which was later relayed to me. (Hint for parents: if there's no in-game tutorial, kids will have no idea what's going on.) So good intentions ran afoul of a lack of gaming knowledge.

When I finally realized at least a year later that I had actually asked for an N64, Pokemon fever was just starting. After getting a Game Boy Color with Pokemon Blue in the summer, a decision my parents would refer to as "his descent into the clutches of gaming," I needed to have an N64 this Christmas for Pokemon Snap. I provided a picture of what I wanted with my wish list. This time, it worked.

I realized that my parents, as well-intentioned as they were, couldn't be expected to know about gaming purchases, such as different systems and which games were good. I soon created more complex lists, including desire-rankings, estimated costs, and eventually even links to where the games could be viewed and bought online. I started getting more and more of what I wanted, but at the cost of surprise.

I could tell that Christmas as a gamer who wouldn't play just anything had changed the process forever in 2001, when the Gamecube launched. This year, I placed the Gamecube (only black, no purple!), a memory card, and Super Smash Bros. Melee at the top of my list, and explained to my parents that just one of these things would not work without the other two. Soon, my parents were openly communicating with me about how hard it was to find a Gamecube, where they could look, and if purple would be acceptable if they found it. (I refused to own a purple Gamecube, incidentally.) There was no longer any surprise in my Christmas gifts; as a gamer, I had replaced the wish list with a grocery list.

Today, I've made peace with the fact that Christmas isn't going to be what it was like as a kid. I pretty much know that I'm going to get a PSP for Christmas, as it's the way things work now. The difference lies mainly in who buys the game, me or a family member. However, I couldn't just lose something and gain nothing. Come Christmas, I'm putting out the Wii front and center to play Wii Sports with my family during our festivities. I can't view the traditions with the same doe-eyed wonder I did as a kid, but hopefully, I can create some new traditions.
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Good fucking post! One of the best reads i've ever seen from you. I get what you're saying. I know what games I'm getting from my wife and mother, as they discuss it with me. And my 14 year old brother is getting like 11 games which he knows of. It's not quite the same at our age, but that don't mean you can't look forward to that PSP. It's a cool portable, enjoy it.
I hear ya buddy. The holidays used to be so magical when we were kids. But yes, ever since i grew up I have given my parents a list with pictures so they dont mistake systems or game titles. Haha.
i know exactly what you mean, Necros.
For me, it's not just gaming that's done that. The problem is, when adults shop for one another they take the "easy way out" and ask one another for an idea of what to buy. Everyone gets something they want, but nobody gets surprised.

This year, I was using my mother's Amazon account because she had free two-day shipping, and went through my purchases only to find at the end she still had all my gifts in her shopping cart. I was not pleased.
Haha, these days I just use google documents for my list :P
yeah, I miss being surprised... I know most of what I'm getting this year:
A PS3
A new bed (which I already have)
Mario Galaxy (which I already have)
Some bargain DS games (which I don't need thanx to R4)
Some bargain Xbox games (sure hope they're compatible)
Some cologne
Mario Party for the Wii (Uuuugggggghhhhh)
A GPS
Maybe Drake's Fortune: Uncharted
Think that's bad? I'm the one who actually works at ToysRUs, and I have to wintess shit like this every fucking day.

I usually recommend the best games though. But you know how parents are these days.
So I matlocked Necros' original list, but I have no idea what it means:

Sadly, with the passing of my American grandparents, I lost my last hope of receiving any new consoles for Christmas. I just don't have enough financially secure relatives. Oh well. When my parents ask me what I want and a video game springs to mind, I'm sure to walk them through it.
Christmas and news years and Halloween do seem to be anticlimactic. something needs to be done!
Haha, I remember asking for a NES for Christmas when I was a kid, and a box about the right size appeared under the tree. After a few weeks of crazy excitement and anticipation, I couldn't wait to play Super Mario on Christmas morning. Finally the day came, and I went straight for that box first thing. I tore off the wrapping paper...

And it was a fucking bike helmet.

The girl is good at picking out presents for me, but I know her so well I usually can figure out what she's getting me anyway. This year I already knew I was getting Guitar Hero 3, long before the present showed up under the tree.
I'll give you a hint, MaxVest: it's "***** FROM WORKMAN."
I miss getting videogames as presents. Now, all I get are cigarettes....
Necros, man, I cave. Your hints are too obscure.
I totally understand not being surprised anymore, ever since my first job, and thus since I've been able to buy things for myself, my parents will just give me money for Xmas. The first xmas i had a job i bought pretty much every game I wanted that season... and my parents had to return 2 which they had already bought...

Anyway I'll give myself a pat in the back and say I still always surprise my 2 best friends, this year one of the presents is "wrapped" in wax (looks like cake frosting) and the other is gonna be "wrapped" on jell-o =P.
Workman's semen, alright? The editors get all they want, but Workman withholds it from the rest of us commoners. Where's our slice of the pie?
@Knives: If that latter “wrapping” is a reference to The Office, that’s fantastic.

Great Rantoid, Necros!

I’m with you 100% regarding your first paragraph: I’m almost always the last out of my friends to get home for the break from college — my average date of return is probably around the 21st — so I always have to make the mad dash to the mall and brave the crazy crowds to get at least one gift.

I’m also in the same boat with the rest of your story, though luckily my parents were always pretty good with getting what we wanted (as long as finances, or lack thereof, weren’t a hindrance). But your post was the topic of the question that I asked on yesterday’s RetroforceGO! “recording” post. As I’ve gotten older (I’m now 21), the surprise has been completely taken out of Christmas — especially for the last two years. Last year, my mom literally said, “If you can find a PS3 in a store, I’ll pay for it” (I had to wait outside a Best Buy for four hours, but I got one on New Year’s Eve). This year, I bought Uncharted and Rock Band on PS3, and my mom’s simply reimbursing me for the ~$250 (don’t forget tax) as a birthday/Christmas gift (my birthday was on November 11th). I also requested some black leather gloves, and I actually met up with her at Macy’s and picked out the pair I wanted. It’s still nice to surprise my parents — my mom especially enjoys it — so my brother and I picked out their gift last night. But my brother has known since Black Friday that he’s getting The Orange Box on 360 for Christmas from me.

Frankly, I don’t so much mind knowing what I’m getting. A pleasant surprise is the best kind, of course (like when my babysitter got my brother and me NHL 95 for the Genesis) — but no one wants to get a gift that they either didn’t particularly want in the first place, or one that they’ll simply end up not using. I probably just feel this way because I’m very picky, especially when it comes to clothes, so I prefer either picking out what I want and having someone get it for me, or just receiving money/gift cards and buying the stuff myself.
After getting a Game Boy Color with Pokemon Blue in the summer, a decision my parents would refer to as "his descent into the clutches of gaming,"

same thing with me, my parents have told me multiple times that they regret buying me a Game Boy and Pokemon, because now I am "addicted to games", which I tell them is better than being addicted to meth... they tend to agree with that point
@Bronx
Yeah, it is =) my friend loves The Office

Also, lol, yesterday I talked to one of my little cousins and he found two presents "From Santa" on my aunt's closet.

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