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About
So... who am I?

Well, I am the guy who headshots you across the map while you're trying to n00b tube my spawn in Call of Duty..

I am the Hunter who pounces on you just as you're in sight of the safehouse in L4D...

I AM THE TERROR THAT FLAPS IN THE NIGHT!!! :0

...sorry, got carried away there :) Seriously, my name is Doug and I am a 35 year old, bi-pedal Earthbased land mammal.

The consoles I have are (in no order of preference):
Xbox 360
PS3 ->PSN ID: BlastAssassin<-
PS2
PSP
DS lite
Wii
And a good old Sega Genesis.

I've been on a PS2 kick lately, catching up on all the awesome games I've missed due to getting too caught up in all the big current gen games hype. I mean,I played Blue frickin' Dragon before Persona 3 !? That's a travesty; and one that I'm currently rectifying. Genres I enjoy (but am not limited to) are RPG's both action and turn-based (preferably WITHOUT random battles,SO annoying), puzzley-type action/adventure games, stealth action games, FPS's and Peggle, or "Crack" as I call it lol.

NVGR, I think Finland has something in the water that makes their Metal bands approximately 183% more awesome than bands from other countries, because there are SO many bands I like from there (Wintersun <3 ,Ensiferum etc.). I do like many styles of music besides Black/ Death/ Folk metal, but alot of people are familiar with the less extreme artists I like so I feel like I gotta pimp Finnish metal lol (*Jari Mäenpäa is THE man*) .

I played drums for around 15 yrs, but haven't played in the last 11 (although I beast the SHIT out of Rockband and World Tour to keep my "hit shit with sticks" skill leveled up. Challenge me sometime... IF YEW GOT DAH BAWLS!) due to not having an appropriate (i.e. soundproof lol) place to setup in addition to work/life responsibilities (FYI: don't get into Health Information Management unless you LIKE something comparable to the sensation of smashing your cock/clit with a sledgehammer daily. And no,I don't think that's an exaggeration lol). But, I still have my sweet ass Tama Starclassic kit awaiting the beautiful day I can return to the love of my life ( don't tell my long-time girlfriend Athena lol ). It WILL happen dammit :) !

So anywho, I think Destructoid is by far the best site for gamers with a great community,a place where intelligence and immaturity can come together in a glorious and beautiful synergy, and I am proud to finally be here after a couple years of lurking.

To surmise, Bewbs ...also, cocks.
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Blasto
7:54 PM on 05.02.2009

Hi! As I'm new and trying not to suck,here is my semi-manditory intro blog,yay! ...So,my IRL name is Doug and I'm a 35 yr old man-child from Springfield,MO (I live 2 blocks from The Simpsons,no lie :p ) I've been into gaming since essentially the beginning.My first console was a Columbia Home Arcade.You may be asking yourself "What in the name of Martha Stewart's sweaty,frosting dipped nipples is a Columbia fucking Home Arcade?".And you would be right to do so.The Columbia Home Arcade was an Atari 2600 clone distributed by Columbia House.You know,12 cds for a penny?Same shit.No big whoop,but it had awesome controllers with a great joystick,built in paddle and the fire on the side.Damn my nostalgic aged brain,here I am already digressing...

Anyway I love about any type of game from JRPG's to FPS's (excluding RTS's and MMO's,bleh).Consoles I currently own and play on are as follows:360,PS3,PS2,PSP,DS lite and a humble Genesis. Games I'm currently playing are:Persona 3:FES,Yakuza,Odin Sphere,Bujingai and Godhand on PS2;Silent Hill:Origins on PSP;Left 4 Dead on 360;Rythym Heaven,Professor Layton and Dementium on DS;Killzone 2 on PS3;and Land Stalker on Genesis.I also enjoy playing with my girlfriend Athena...tee hee.As for other interests,I have none as I weigh 900 pounds and have to be carried by forklift to the bathroom and my orifices (orifi?) exposed via a system of pulleys and levers for my evacuations.Har har just kidding;for now.Hey,a guy can dream can't he?

So,to wrap up,I've been lurking around her for over a year and as my testicles finally arrived today from Amazon (free shipping,yay!) I thought I should go ahead and bolster your ranks.There are many community members and staff here who've brought much joy to my life.I can't recall a day that I haven't literally LOL'D at least once while perusing the 'Toid,and for that I thank you all.One more thing,I'm typing this on my PS3,so if it looks funky please forgive me.May you all be blessed by the deity of your choice.As for myself,I choose Satan 'cause he's got the best tunes...
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