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12:42 PM on 09.01.2008

Video Game Violence: Scapegoat for Bad Parenting

Captain Obvious here saying:

After reading what Perrin Kaplan had to say, I just wanted to say this and crawl back in my hole.

Video games are no god damn substitute for parenting. No one talks to their kids these days, instead it seems that people plant their kids in front of the XBox and f*ck off. If the kid turns out to be f*cked up in head and causes harm to himself and/or others, it's likely that parents will blame the video game rather than themselves.

If their freakish bastard child holds target practice at his/her school, will parents ask themselves what they should have done to prevent this? Hell no. They're wonderful parents, and he was a little angel until they installed that computer machine in his room because little Timmy would have never done anything like that if he didn't play Counter-Strike! "I mean sure he was a loner, and was bullied in school, and he had low marks, and he talked back to his elders, but that's because of Doom, dammit!"

Well, how did he get the game in the first place? Were the parents monitoring his behavior? How about checking what websites he browses? Have the parents ever tried talking to their kids, finding out what's on their minds, and maybe helping them through any emotional strife he/she is going through? Whenever he acts out could it very well be a plea for help?

Adolescence is such an important time in a child's life, and parents need to show their children that they're there to help them anytime with any problem they have to face whether they want to or not. Many parents don't seem to be showing much moral support for their kids anymore, and they wonder why Junior shot up his high school.   read

10:54 PM on 07.10.2008

Wii knockoff: Zone Wireless Gaming

When going to grab some food at a local store, I found this:

I've heard of the Vii and the Vii 2, and I never thought I would ever see a Wii knockoff face to face. I brought it to the counter and paid for it. I brought it home and set it all up. I turned on my newly acquired Zone Wireless Gaming 16 bit 7-in-1 Sports Pack console and was quickly disappointed. This bastard needs batteries, but not just any old double-A's. THREE triple-A's are needed for EACH controller, not to mention 4 AAA's for the "console" itself. Well, I went out and got some damn batteries.

Here are some pictures of the unveiling:

I decided to do a writeup of each game in the "Sports pack":

TV Boxing

This is the only game out of the bunch that allows a single player to use both controllers. But since I didn't buy enough batteries for both remotes, I'm just punching southpaw. Now, the control really sucks. I found myself waving the thing in the air to punch, and when my arms got tired I ended up using the buttons on the controller. There's no way to control where your punches are going to land, so pressing one button all the time insures your victory. There's a power bar that's pretty useless and the health bar graphics get messed up every once in a while. Sometimes there aren't any sound effects when punches are thrown. The art style is really lame and there's only a few frames of animation. The best part about this game is when choosing the boxer you want to fight, the game says "CHOOSE YOUR POWER" a-la Double Dribble.

VR Tennis

I tap the button and I win every time.

EXTREME Power Soccer

You have to choose what player you want and what team to play before you can play this great simulator. The aim of the game is to line up these two yellow markers in a window in the corner of the screen. After shooting ten balls into the net in Practice mode, the game prompts you to "KEEP PRATICING" You have to press reset on the machine to get back to the "game" list. Technique mode has you bouncing a soccer ball in front of the same background. Oh, whenever you hit the ball, a sign comes up saying "WINERS SPORT". In Player VS Computer, you and the computer take turns kicking the ball into the net. It's impossible to block the ball because where you move is random.


It's got a meter along the bottom of the screen like in Mario Golf, but guess what, it doesn't matter where the marker lands, you'll always make it to the green. All of the courses are the same, and the addition of choosing which club to use is a little excessive in my opinion.

World Series Baseball

There's a neat animation when it starts up, but it all goes downhill when the screen tells you to press enter and you're looking all over the controller for the "enter" key, and all you can find is "start". Someone decided to put the ESPN logo on one of the billboards.

Table Tennis

It's the same as VR Tennis. Boring.


Remember Wii Bowling? Remember how fun it was lo line up your shots and score and all that shit? Well, this is nothing like that, because Wii Bowling was fun. This back alley abortion passed off as "bowling" is anything but fun. You have to get the marker in the middle to get a strike. If you want to score a spare, you shoot the ball on the left, then on the right. The most entertaining thing is that one of the playable characters, Daniel looks like Dr. Breen.

Some of these games have awesome 80's and 90's "radical" music, like Power Rangers and some shit, and others don't have any music at all. Don't buy this game. I'm bringing it back for a refund tomorrow.   read

12:45 AM on 06.08.2008

The Start of the Affair: Mega Man

After listening to a back episode of "RetroforceGO!", I heard that Chad Concelmo used to draw pictures of Wily bosses he'd made up. I'm just going to go on record and say that I was even nerdier than Mr. Concelmo. I used to draw Mega Man ALWAYS. I used to play, draw, eat, shit, and dream Mega Man. Hell, I thought the Ruby Spears Mega Man series was GOOD, just because it was a cartoon about the blue bomber.


It all started when I was just a baby sitting beside my Dad while I watched him play the original Mega Man on the NES. I have fond memories watching him die over and over on Guts Man's stage. I failed even harder when I was given the controller, but there was something about Mega Man that I absolutely loved. Maybe it was the fact that I could choose any level I wanted from the get-go, or that I thought Mega Man looked like a monkey in blue tights. Regardless of the reason, I was sucked right in.

Almost every day of my childhood was spent playing Mega Man. When I beat Hard Man for the first time, I ran to my Mom and said "Hard Man is hard!" LOL memes. My brother and I took turns trying to beat the robot masters. We shat our pants trying to get through Quick Man's stage with the lasers.

I loved Skull Man's level. For some reason it was spooky seeing those enemies throw bones at me. Skull Man was also a bitch to bring down, but I eventually got that asshole.

I had an issue of Nintendo Power that had an ad for Mega Man 5 and I was so stoked to try it out. I never could get my hands on it for another few years. I f*cking love the level design in that game(except Crystal Man, he and his level can die in a fire). the stages always kept me coming back to Mega Man 5. Even though many people see it as one of the weaker games in the series, who DOESN'T like Gravity Man's stage?

I didn't mind Mega Man 6, I thought the bosses were a little lame, like Flame Man, and Blizzard Man, and let's not forget PLANT Man. Yeah, like Mega Man is seriously going to have any trouble bringing down a flower. Good job Robot Master designers.

In closing, Mega Man was the series that ruined my childhood. I love that little blue monkey.   read

12:05 PM on 06.05.2008

Bizznet Has a Little Problem..

This past month I bought many games. These games include: Persona 3 FES, BioShock(PC), Mario Kart Wii, The Orange Box(PC and again for XBox360), Lost Odyssey, Gears of War, Halo 3, and GTA IV.

So far, I've only beaten BioShock and Portal. I'm 10 hours into Persona 3 FES, barely even started Lost Odyssey, Gears, or Halo. I'm 1/4 into the 100cc tracks in MKWii, halfway through Half-life 2. I'm buying games faster than I'm beating them. Hell, I only have 25 stars in Mario Galaxy, and I bought that when it was released!

And don't even get me started on the Virtual Console and XBLA games I've downloaded...

I'm looking around and I realized I've only beaten about 10% of the games I own. I'm excited for new games coming out, yet I haven't played through the ones I already have. I've made a vow to try and beat as many of these games as possible this summer.   read

11:16 AM on 05.28.2008

The Greatest Comic Book Writer Ever. Also XBawks.

I picked up "The Authority: The Amazing Kev" and read a bit of it, instead of my game manuals, while I was on the can today. It was too funny. I laughed out loud, something most writers fail to do.

He trumps Kevin Smith. Yes, I said it, Garth Ennis is better than Smith.

he writes for the MAX label "Punisher", and I suggest giving it a read, although it's much darker than most of his other works. "Preacher" is fucking hilarious, and the Marvel Knights "Punisher" series was quite funny.

Although he writes comic books, his characters are always ordinary joes, and his serials don't even feature superheroes/villains. Well, most of them at least.

His Series "The Boys" Depicts a world where most superheroes, or supes, are sponsored by corporations, like athletes and get paid to save the world. The main character, Wee Hughie witnesses the death of his girlfriend, where she is crushed to death by a supervillain flung at her by the hero A-Train. He meets a man who tells him he's hired by the government to keep supes in line by kicking the shit out of them, or in extreme cases, killing them, he tells Hughie that he can have revenge on A-Train. He offers Hughie the job, and Hughie takes it.

(Hughie holding his late girlfriend's arms, in shock)

If anyone even just a SLIGHT interest in comics, I suggest you go out and get some trade paperbacks of some of his work. I suggest:

-Punisher MAX
-The Boys
-A Man Called Kev

There's a lot more, but those were the ones I could think of off the top of my head.

Oh yeah, Halo 3 on XBox Live is fun.   read

10:31 PM on 05.25.2008

My New Router > Me

I must be the last person in the world to buy an XBox 360. Just half a week ago I had the bright idea to go to the closest Best Buy and purchased the XBox 360 Elite, Halo 3, Gears of War, and Lost Odyssey. Being mostly a PC gamer, I already own Call of Duty 4, BioShock, Oblivion, and the Orange Box.

The biggest reason I bought a 360 was the XBox Live community, also, I have a few old friends from high school who each own the console. The only problem now, was choosing what brand of router to pick from.

I previously owned a Linksys wireless-G a few years back, which I got, not only to connect both my computer and my Dad's to the internet, and to take advantage of the DS's Wi-Fi connection(which oddly wasn't compatible until I discovered I was able to connect my Wii to it). At first my Dad and I had a ton of trouble getting it connected for that day. We ended up throwing out the wireless USB adapters we bought that day and wiring the computers because we were fed up with the constant disconnecting and reconnecting of the wireless. But after the first two months of owning the router, the problems began to disappear.

Now, maybe it's because of the combination of the modem/router that my new Wireless-G isn't working(I have an ARRIS brand modem), I don't know. A friend of mine got the router to work after 6 hours of toying around. Then, its favorable performance proceeded to fuck right off after my friend left. My modem did not want to share with my Linksys as soon as I finished updating the XBox, and establishing a Live account.

I now have to return it to the store and I'm thinking of getting a D-Link, Netgear, or some other brand of modem. Something that's better than THIS piece of shit or is compatible with an ARRIS modem.   read

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