Thank you my friends for joining me tonight. Tonight's weekend review is obviously my weekend in Cincinnati at the NARP. But first, let me take you through that fateful friday.

So I woke up around 7:00....nah just kidding.

The first part of my epic journey north was actually to go West and pick up someone I had never met before, SwiftKarateChop. After meeting him and his dad in Lebanon(and by the way, Swifty has the pimpest dad I have ever met) we headed north into the wild lands of Kentucky, bravely facing any dangers we might encounter. Lo and behold danger we found. After following a road for at least 5 miles after the "Warning, road work ahead" first appeared, we encountered something I had never seen before: a road that literally just ended. After cussing out the road planners of that fine state, I proceeded to follow the detour the magical wizards had put out for us. This little detour put an hour onto the total trip time, but since Swifty kept me entertained with youtube stories, the time passed quickly.

After passing through KY(I still snicker) I found myself in one of the most confusing road systems ever evented; the greater Cinci area. It took getting instructions from the illustrious Coonskin to find my way to the right road. Then not only did I arrive at the hotel within the time he told me, but I actually got to visit the quirky state of Indiana. I think the road designers just wanted to show you everything you 'aren't' missing in Indy.

Now the fun part truly starts. Never before in my life have I ever experienced anything like this. As I walk up to the hotel in my Dtoid shirt, I large person comes running up to me in a wicked beard. I instantly recognize him as the infamous TazartheYoot and as soon as I said my name I was immediately put into a bear hug of crushing proportions. The others standing around introduced themselves, such as blehman, and I immediately knew I was among friends. I met Coonskin and knew I had met my younger brother during my mom's wilder days. He showed me into the Taft Room, or Blue Chip room or whatever the hell it was called and I swear it was weird having people walking up to me and knowing who I was without having to introduce myself. Great feeling.

After playing rock band with just about everyone and drinking all the beer I could find, myself, item40 and mattfoo went out to hunt for stronger liquids than beer. The instructions we received from Mr. Burling led us to the right place but unfortunately he was sadly mistaken on the time limit for selling liquor. It is not, in fact, 1 am in Ohio. So we settled for beer, took it back to the hotel and continued the party. Ron, I know you wanted to go all out with midget strippers and donkey shows, but drinking beer with people I have been interacting with for a year over the internet was just as much fun. And if you wanted a midget so bad, you should have just dressed up Zserv.

I went back to the hotel room with item40, blehman, Coonskin and Pangloss and me and my bed buddy went to our side of the room for a little fun, while blehman huddled in the corner trying to ignore the piercing cries of Pangloss as item violated his inner being.

Waking up, I immediately sought out the fridge for my last beer from the 12-pack I had purchased. After drinking a couple of beers and wishing we had bloodymary's, we proceeded to find the closest waffle house. It was there that I saw my good friend, and recent lover Coonskin, utterly embarassed by MaxVest's 90-lb girlfriend. It was quite an impressive thing to see and you would have had to been there to truly witness the look on Coon's face.

What followed is a whirlwind of events. After waffle house we made a liquor run and then helped set up for several hours. That culminated in having the privelege of laying on top of a giant woman with boobs the size of my body. Thank you for that experience Ron, Joe and Nino!

We returned to the hotel for some serious pre-party drinking. After getting a ride back to the bar from BongDonkey and seeing Coon try to pull Swifty's face off, the real party began.

Here are some of the highlights of my night:

Giving RiserGlen his first JagerBomb
Watching COD being played on 5 huge screens
Playing rock band and realizing I am WAY too drunk to play drums
Dancing to GuitarAtomik and the other DJ(don't know his name)
Taking the Jagerbomb Riser didn't want with Droobies' girl
Buying Atomik and mid3vol drinks
Buying cigars with a LOT of people and then forgetting to smoke it
Forgetting my IKILLPXLS cd and my cigar at the Rock Band station but SteamyV's girlfriend saved it for me. Erin, you rock!(I'm totally stealing her from you Steamy ;))
Jacking my ankle up while being a total whiteboy to Souljah Boi
Dancing with Britini Martin
Hanging out all night with all of you

Here are a couple more of videos from that night; one of GuitarAtomik performing and one of me and BongDonkey drinking Lunchboxes. I apologize about the quality. They were taken with a camera phone.







And finally, the video many of you have probably come to see. So without further ado, I present to you, BigPopa's NARP video:



I hope you enjoyed it. Let me honestly say a big thanks to NinoOg3, Buck Fitches and Ron Workman for organizing this and allowing me to experience being a part of our crazy, dysfunctional family. My first year anniversary with Dtoid is coming up in June or July(I can't remember, it's late) and I can't think of a better way to start the summer. I hope to see many of you soon. It is something special when a group of people as diverse as we are can come together and accept each other as we are.

Good night, and good luck. Stay classy Destructoid.