This week multiple bouts of memes rocked our little community - I hear one was about Yu-Gi-Oh? Every now and again these things spring up like cicadas and the forest that is our cbog section becomes glutted with them. Now, all told I bear the meme no ill will. Granted, they will push away any legitimate blogs like a sumo match between The Blob and a kitten, but only those without the faintest inkling of intelligence would try to contribute anything else during one of these spawning frenzies of internet silliness. Everything considered, it's impossible not to relish the undiluted mixture of the humorous and the outright bizarre delivered.

In truth, the idea of the Destructoid meme fascinated me and as such I attempted to study them like an entomologist confronted by a new species of vulgar butterfly. However, my first research seemingly yielded little. As I dived in among the gaumless legion of posts, all I could observe was an abyssal maw of madness, a perfect fractal of chaos repeating itself to the bounds of infinity.

Yet with time, I came to realize the chilling reality: this was all there was to know. Be it born of hate, love, or boredom, be it propagated by passion or even more boredom, the meme exists as a manifestation of untamed mania. Confronted with the knowledge its relentless, unbounded nature, I naively thought to harness the surge of a meme, to channel the furious energies to my own ends.

In the end, my bid for power left me as the tattered wretch of a man who writes to you now. The meme is an entity beholden to neither threats nor cajoling nor any armament we frail mortals may hope to wield against it. It is anarchy given form and it would tear everything we know to pieces were it not subject to its own fickle attentions. Time is all that may bind it; we alone are agents too frail to do anything but hope to carry on when the worst is over.

But before it cast me reeling away, broken and blind, I saw in those depths of madness the form of the next breach into our fragile world. I know not the manner of its conception, only that it storms unerringly towards us. With trepidation, I reveal it herein that you might raise what fortifications you can against its coming. Hold safe your children Destructoid, for this will be the face of the next great meme:



I swear to Quaker Oats, if you somehow make this a real meme, I will bring back "People I hate most on Destructoid" and you will all find yourselves at the suffering as the points on my well-formatted list.