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To All the Angry People - Destructoid




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My name is Benny. I work full time in a freak show eating live chickens, and I work part time as Brendan Fraser's scrotum cleanser.

I play video games sometimes, but most of the time I'm too poor and don't have enough free time. I still like talking about them though.
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Okay, so the Super Mario 3D World review went up today and many people were surprised at the 10/10. A lot of people after the "A Link Between Worlds" review thought that Destructoid would give the game a 5 or 6 out of 10, as seen in this forum thread.

The reasoning behind this really gets under my skin. They automatically assume that if someone has strong opinions about something, that there has to be an ulterior motive or outside reason behind it.†

For instance, people assumed that Chris Carter gave "A Link Between Worlds" a 6.5 because he hated Nintendo/wasn't qualified to review the game/was simply biased/was using the article to get attention and clicks/wanted to sabotage the Metacritic score/had his dog killed by a man dressed as Link, etc.†


Thank God that last one isn't true! D'aaaaaawwww!


These angry people assume things about someone just because of their enjoyment level of a certain product.

To these people, I want to show you something important:



Yes, this is the music video to the song "Every Morning" by Sugar Ray, and no, this isn't some sort of weird Rick Roll variant.

When I was in Elementary school this song was huge, and a lot of the kids obsessed over it, memorizing all of the lyrics and such. Some of these kids assumed that if you didn't like this song, it was because you were weird and uncool.

Do you see where I'm going with this?


NO! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA- [Screams eternally]


My point is that if you can't accept that someone else is enjoying something less/more than you are (or predict that you will, considering a lot of these people haven't even played the games), and you assume that it's because that person has something to gain by "fixing" the review scores, then you're using 5th grade reasoning.

So come on guys. Join us in the adult world and make jokes about floppy dicks and smelly bum-holes instead!

Thanks for reading!
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