Dutch Poleaxe - destructoid

Banj says:
What time you off out tonight?

LoweyRamone says:
7:30pm

Banj says:
To a casino?

LoweyRamone says:
Bernards mam is driving us to the casino

LoweyRamone says:
yup

Banj says:
Her mam is taking you?

Banj says:
...what are you? Fucking 10?

LoweyRamone says:
no she's dropping us off you shitcunt

LoweyRamone says:
saves taxi fare

Banj says:
Way to impress the inlaws tightcunt.

LoweyRamone says:
her idea shitmouth

Banj says:
...trust me, she was hoping you'd copper up.

LoweyRamone says:
i asked at least 20 times

LoweyRamone says:
she said she wanted me to spend it on her instead

LoweyRamone says:
so i'll buy her a drink or 2

LoweyRamone says:
no more though ain't made of money

Banj says:
fuck that, get her steaming drunk then kick her back doors in.

LoweyRamone says:
she fucks me sober

LoweyRamone says:
i'm a loverman

Banj says:
up the trumper?

LoweyRamone says:
not trumped her yet

Banj says:
ergo, let the wine flow like rain...

LoweyRamone says:
ha ha

LoweyRamone says:
so thats what you did on your first few dates with 2-sock then? Got her pissed and bummed her?

LoweyRamone says:
nice...

Banj says:
Fuck me no, I still ain't cracked that nut.

LoweyRamone says:
never!

LoweyRamone says:
you lame bastards

Banj says:
She'll do anything else so I can't complain.

Banj says:
I'm not a huge fan of 'shitty-cock' anyway.

LoweyRamone says:
yeah but it's like have a sticker album but needing a 'shiney' to complete it

Banj says:
She doesn't drink anymore either so that shits out.

LoweyRamone says:
would she play a game of shit-sock with you?

Banj says:
...besides, it's like having a sticker album with one shiney of a shitty cock missing.

Banj says:
...wouldn't be that bothered.

LoweyRamone says:
ha ha

LoweyRamone says:
depends what the album was about

LoweyRamone says:
if it was a sticker album about shitty-cocks then it would be a big loss

LoweyRamone says:
i can remember my brother collecting the snooker sticker album

LoweyRamone says:
he gave me all the swaps and i had pictures of really shit snooker players all over my bedroom eg Willy Thorne on my lamp and a Neal Folwds collage on my TV cabinet

Banj says:
You lo-fi, hand-me-down-stickers, shitcunt.

LoweyRamone says:
true but if i hadn't have looked grateful he would have pinned me down and trumped in my mouth AKA a Dutch Poleaxe

Banj says:
...ha ha ha, Dutch Poleaxe

Banj says:
I'm using that.

LoweyRamone says:
Dutch Napalm = a strafing pump used when all your friends are sat on the settee
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