I'm getting ready to get on the subway, so I need to make sure it's full.
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I hate to say this. I really do. Because I love the people behind this site in a manner that warms my cockels. Even down beneath the sub-cockel area. in fact it it this love that drives me to say certain things that won't be able to be unsaid and probably won't be very popular. but here goes. whiskey certainly unlocsk my inner asshole
The new color scheme is a horrible eyesore and blatant cash grab for a shitty wii shovelware game and honestly, kind of makes me depressed my favorite rebel games site has succumbed to the green, something I knew was inevitable but still leaves me sort of bitter and sad. Not to mention the new layout has many more ads + adwords that are not discreet and certainly make the experience of browsing one of my favorites sites less of a pleasure.
sorry guys. I had to say it.
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$20 says she kicks it before August
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I'm just hoping it was liberty city and not nyc. whatever. I think the cops are looking for me anyway.
seriously though you should try it. I just nudged this dude "by accident" onto the tracks and it made a really funny sound when the train hit him.
again, hopefully I am talking about the game gta 4 and not a real life situation.
four hits of acid will do that
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the best part about this is that if you're an idiot, it looks like the real MTA map, and it's right above my bed. I'll consider it an intelligence test for the morning after
Attached photos:
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I dabble in investing in stock.
I know, I know, you're all thinking to yourselves "damn I look FOINE in this pair of women's panties" and then maybe after you read that sentence you're thinking "it's like being kissed by satin on my man-parts all day!" well you are weird and deserve to be fondled by mr.sadistic. But besides those thoughts (I hacked your livejournal) you might also say to yourself "gee, BahamaslutZero...? isn't that the guy who's more famous for being drunk than posting hilarious yet uninformed and sarcastic comments?"
to which I say, "I will mash your face into a jelly of some sort." and which I will continue to say "I am smarter than I look."
Now I'm sure the following advice will be completely lost on the under 20s who can barely scrape enough change together for chipotle let alone stocks, but I know there are a few old men and wise youngins who've thought about it.
Without starting a flame war (yeah right) I will present some of my own observations
I owned Nintendo for a long time, until recently, and made out pretty well, considering I invested before the wii came out. Now the best kind of stock to get is one that will appreciate, not necessarily just the most profitable companies. Case in point, nintendo stock has been pretty flat, because the explosive growth of the wii and ds has slowed down quite a bit. The big investment firms are looking for the "next big thing" already.
MS stock is bogged down by the ricockulous failure of vista (financially) despite the Live and Xbox sectors turning quite profitable. They are also being hit pretty hard by hardware returns, market saturation (growth of 360 is similarly plateuing), and competition from Mac and Linux.
Now Sony was despised by investors for months and months, certainly stemming in part from missteps in marketing and launching the ps3. I would argue that its current stock price is artificially undervalued, as it was a poor performer while they were losing money on hardware and PR blunders. However this is a great time to pick it up, as many investors are slow on the uptake for videogame news. especially recent figures by analysts stating the PS3 may ALREADY be turning a profit for sony, as well as the recent explosion of PSP sales due to several AAA titles. I would further go on to say that despite the obvious win for sony in the bluray department, people haven't quite yet "come around" to adopting bluray, and that that market in particular may explode as prices on players and movies drop even further.
Why am I sharing this with you? Because destructoid is awesome. Currently my sony shares are up over $600 since about a month and a half ago. Just a thought.
tl;dr - Peanut butter and jelly taste great together. especially on bread.
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I dabble in investing in stock.
I know, I know, you're all thinking to yourselves "damn I look FOINE in this pair of women's panties" and then maybe after you read that sentence you're thinking "it's like being kissed by satin on my man-parts all day!" well you are weird and deserve to be fondled by mr.sadistic. But besides those thoughts (I hacked your livejournal) you might also say to yourself "gee, BahamaslutZero...? isn't that the guy who's more famous for being drunk than posting hilarious yet uninformed and sarcastic comments?"
to which I say, "I will mash your face into a jelly of some sort." and which I will continue to say "I am smarter than I look."
Now I'm sure the following advice will be completely lost on the under 20s who can barely scrape enough change together for chipotle let alone stocks, but I know there are a few old men and wise youngins who've thought about it.
Without starting a flame war (yeah right) I will present some of my own observations
I owned Nintendo for a long time, until recently, and made out pretty well, considering I invested before the wii came out. Now the best kind of stock to get is one that will appreciate, not necessarily just the most profitable companies. Case in point, nintendo stock has been pretty flat, because the explosive growth of the wii and ds has slowed down quite a bit. The big investment firms are looking for the "next big thing" already.
MS stock is bogged down by the ricockulous failure of vista (financially) despite the Live and Xbox sectors turning quite profitable. They are also being hit pretty hard by hardware returns, market saturation (growth of 360 is similarly plateuing), and competition from Mac and Linux.
Now Sony was despised by investors for months and months, certainly stemming in part from missteps in marketing and launching the ps3. I would argue that its current stock price is artificially undervalued, as it was a poor performer while they were losing money on hardware and PR blunders. However this is a great time to pick it up, as many investors are slow on the uptake for videogame news. especially recent figures by analysts stating the PS3 may ALREADY be turning a profit for sony, as well as the recent explosion of PSP sales due to several AAA titles. I would further go on to say that despite the obvious win for sony in the bluray department, people haven't quite yet "come around" to adopting bluray, and that that market in particular may explode as prices on players and movies drop even further.
Why am I sharing this with you? Because destructoid is awesome. Currently my sony shares are up over $600 since about a month and a half ago. Just a thought.
tl;dr - Peanut butter and jelly taste great together. especially on bread.
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I like porn. Who doesn't? Sure it's gotten me some trouble like when my ex walked in on me wearing nothing but headphones wanking it to some Ethiopian lion-rape, but all in all, the internet has treated me kindly. (You guys should really find the rick astley sex tape. hot stuff.)
Anyway, I'm getting to what this has to do with cars in a minute, so sit on your fucking hands for a spot and give yourself "the stranger." Cars, to me, are a lot like women: used for a while to give rides to your friends, and then abandoned for something sexier. GT5 is car porn, and I love it.
2 years ago I had to sell my prized, beloved 1995 black BMW 325i for various reasons not related to my status as a registered sex offender. (mostly because insurance + tickets in NYC are a fucking bitch). I loved that car more than probably anything in my life except booze - smooth and responsive on the low end of acceleration, you could back her up at an inch at a time. I was zen master of parallel parking in that car, and she turned on a dime (bag). Best turn radius of anything I've ever driven (although I had a subaru outback before that I also thought was great, that came close.)
But of course that wasn't the fun part. All the torque for the acceleration in that car had been shoved into the range of 60-130 mph, and you could feel it waiting to open up on the highway. There was a little click past "flooring" the pedal that would kick in overdrive, and it was like lighting a fart after a baked-bean-eating contest: the fucker could fly. I'd pass mustangs and motorcycles like they were VW bugs (don't drive crazy kids. I could have killed myself. luckily I only ever got one ticket and it was in SC. figures, meow.)
Anyway, my heart broke in pieces when I had to sell it, although I'd put over 150,000 miles and it was her time. So many things needed fixing it wasn't worth it anymore. So when I first got GT5 prologue I promptly sat down and was pissed I needed 100,000 credits just to get my first BMW M3. I begrudgingly bought an RX-7 or something and started racing.
But I got bored. I only played for 20 minutes and then put in rock band. The graphics were amazing, the cars were some of the best looking I'd ever seen in a video game, but something seemed missing.
The next day however something pulled me back. A call for the open road. I started playing again and the thrill of driving down an empty highway from connecticut to cape cod at 120 mph came flooding back, especially when I figured out there was an amazingly realistic and responsive internal view.
Honestly this is one of my new favorite driving games, despite a lack of collision damage (even in forza it was broken, and unless the crashes are burnout quality I don't mind having it without them). While sure, maybe it's not complete enough to justify $40, but there really is a ton of stuff to do, not to mention it's a great way to show off your ps3, if you're a whore like that. I can literally just sit for an hour in the dealerships drooling over cars.
Oh it's also really fun to drive drunk. In the game.
Anyway, TL;DR: By the time you have read this I will already be dead.
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