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Turok - Epic Fail
BaBaBaBaBirdman | 2:40 PM on 01.30.2008 19 comments


Turok, oh, Turok. How I longed for thee. I downloaded the demo only to be disappointed. I
don't know why I expected great things from this game. It's probably because all the footage
I saw of it looked amazing. Well, I played the demo, and I must say... it was terrible. I'd give
it a measly 4/10 at best, and that's only cause the graphics were kind of sort of okay.

The knife was fucking ridiculous. You could only use it when the little icon for RT says you can.
Oh, look, an enemy. Don't try to stab him yourself! Wait till the little icon gives you it's
approval. Then, and only then, you can enjoy a cool little cut scene (only to be killed half way
through it by some random asshole chucking grenades your way).

Bow and Arrow? Can't say much. I'd rather lick my own asshole than play with that weapon in
any video game ever again. Oh, Turok. How you failed me, I don't know.

Also, what the french? Toast.

P.S. This game is about as useful/awesome as a dolphin with a rocket launcher strapped to it's
back. (Not to say a dolphin wielding a rocket launcher isn't cool)



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17 comments | showing # 1 to 17
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LeonSK's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 14:52
LeonSK
Agreed! I wish they'd go back to the Native American backstory. And the cerebral bore.
HawtPawkitHero's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 14:53
HawtPawkitHero
But... it's a demo!

Devil may cry 4 demo was probably the best demo i've played in a long, long time.
BlindsideDork's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 14:53
BlindsideDork
Actually you can use the knife whenever you want. Try pressing it when you don't see the icon...that icon just indicates automatic kill. Fail.

If you can't appreciate the bow (tech or not) and arrow, you probably shouldn't be playing Turok, a game that you are supposed to be a Native American. Fail.

And Chad would probably have to say a dolphin with a rocker launcher on his back would be useful. Could've killed the Cloverfield monster before it attacked Manahattan.
Fails.

I give this a meager 3/3 fails.
Snaileb 's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 15:06
Snaileb
"[i]Bow and Arrow? I'd rather lick my own asshole than play with that weapon in any video game ever again. How you failed me[i]"

So.. you're pissed off because a TUROK game has a bow and arrow as a weapon? My mind just exploded, I can't even think of anything to say, except that was a big part of ALL Turok games.

I probably wont like it either, though. And don't play Prey if you hate the Bow and Arrow.
CaffeinePowered's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 15:07
CaffeinePowered
The only good Turok was the first on the n64
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 15:08
blehman
[i]BBCODE? I'd rather lick my own asshole than play with that code on any video game website ever again. How you failed me[i]

Fixed for snaileb!
Snaileb 's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 15:09
Snaileb
ooooh I knew I could count on you Blehman!
king3vbo's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 15:20
king3vbo
Turok has always sucked
big filth's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 15:23
big filth
I dont know man. I thought this demo was ok. What more do you want? you have big guns, big dinos, and the ability to make the dino's eat the human enemies.

sounds like a recipe for fun to me.
GoldBond's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 15:32
GoldBond
It's Turok. WTF did you expect? When did this become an anticipated title?
dgenerate's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 15:51
dgenerate
I was worried this game would be unfairly torn to pieces by the public. While I don't think it's a particularly good game, I certainly don't think it was EPIC FAIL!!
Also, was this Propaganda's first game?

I'm still cautiously optimistic for the full game. The first 2 in the series have me craving more.
PANZERDRAKO's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 16:32
PANZERDRAKO
you mean this turok is SO BAD like the ps2´s turok?
coz that game was awful!
Eschatos's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 17:21
Eschatos
It might be ok, but that's the best I'll give it.
xper's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 17:57
xper
the turok demo was pretty fail...

and this is the first time i've seen someone rate a demo?! you must have a pretty warped image of how games are rated
GoldBond's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 18:01
GoldBond
Yeah, but it's Turok, so it probably deserves it anyway.
xper's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/30/2008 18:04
xper
hahahahaha

i have no further questions your honor...
BaBaBaBaBirdman's Avatar - Comment posted on 01/31/2008 11:38
BaBaBaBaBirdman
What I ment by the bow and arrow is that it's impossible to kill someone with it. And, holy crap, don't even think about killing a Dino with it. Every time I tried to use the bow and arrow I would get attacked by a random dinosaur.
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