So, I know I haven't been very active on Dtoid as of late, but I am still alive. Also, I have a huge surprise.


That was one of the top Google responses for the word, surprise. I swear to you.

Anywho, the big surprise is that I will be attending this year's E3. That's right. I managed to get a ticket through work (my firm consults for some of the larger developers), so I will be out there the Sunday before and I'll be there all week.

I'm hoping that I'll finally get a chance to meet some of the awesome editors of this lovely site and anyone else who somehow managed to get tickets themselves. Please PM me if you're attending and want to meet up for some game playing or drinking or what have you.

Any other good Dtoiders out there going to be making the trip?

IGN is reporting on a Rare blog post that includes a tiny thumbnail on a user's 360 blade that shows a blurry photo of Joanna Dark before she became a punk ass teenager. Does this mean that Rare's long-awaited HD conversion of the N64 classic is on its way? Have Microsoft and Rare been fucking with us? Have they settled their rights issues with Nintendo?


I remember begging my parents to buy me this as an early birthday present when it released and then my copy was a blank cartridge and it sat around in my collection for 2 years before I ever picked it up and sent it back to Nintendo to replace it, but let me tell you, when it came back... shit. The rest is my gaming history!

Sweet merciful Jesus I hope so! Perfect Dark on the N64 is still my all-time favorite multiplayer game. I played 120 hours of it one summer years after release by myself against bots just 'cause I fucking could.


The proverbial money shot.

Give me the same game, HD graphics, and online multiplayer (with bots) and Rare, you can go ahead and charge me a full $60 worth of Microsoft's magic money. I don't care. MAKE IT HAPPEN.

PS - As anyone who knows me realizes, this would complete my "repurchase trifecta" of Rez, MvC2 (assuming Capcom's hints and rumors aren't smoke and mirrors), and PD, of the only past generation games I'm willing to shell more money out for (since I still own all my original copies and systems. I'm really excited. You should be, too!

This is an addendum to my previously posted Killzone 2 review, just so you know.

In my previous write up I did a lot of praising on Guerilla Games for their work on KZ2, and while I wholeheartedly stand by my assessment and score of a perfect 10/10, I do have one MAJOR beef with the game. Don’t worry it’s not with the awesome multiplayer. It’s solely with the single player. This rant is partially with KZ2 but veers into general game design for a time. Playing through KZ2 just brought it to the forefront of my consciousness, so I need to vent it.

As anyone who’s played the game knows, KZ2 uses a cover mechanic somewhat similar to that of the recent Rainbow Six games. It’s a cross between them and Gears-style cover. You run to a position and pull the crouch button (yeah, so much for trying to crouch while in cover) and you get pulled into cover, but unlike RS games or Gears, the camera stays in the first person perspective. This sounds cool except the game still wants you to be able to see where your enemies are, so they have you peak over the edge of whatever you’re hiding behind rather unrealistically. Oh, and you can’t blind fire… at all, which sort of destroys your ability to lay any sort of distractive cover fire of any kind.


Add these while you're at it, too, Guerilla.

Now, I don’t mind games that keep you in a forced first person perspective. I loved me some Mirror’s Edge and Farcry 2 (very much so, in fact) but I don’t want a game like KZ2 to destroy playability and tactics in an effort to keep me “immersed” in the experience, especially not when I’m armed with a defibrillator gun that can revive people with lightning from across a room.

I don’t think there is any sane reason why the cover system in KZ2 positions the player the way it does beyond just wanting to be “different.” I mean, what purpose does it actually serve? Does the game want me fully immersed as my character? Hmm, could be but then that raises the question as to why all of the cutscenes are seen from a totally third person perspective and highlight my character doing things I have no control over whatsoever. If they wanted to go that route, they shoulda pulled a Half-Life and at the very least kept you in the first-person perspective (if not kept the antagonist silent throughout the title… a huge non-no with their HIGHLY talented writing team, those fuckity fucker fucks).

The issue of cover raises another HUGE issue I had with the game’s general design because, when in cover, your only option is to pop up (or over) to shoot. However, if you watch your enemies for more than two seconds they can clearly blindfire from cover and even go prone. Hell, they can even roll in/out of cover while running, kneeling, or prone and provide a much wider variety of shooting positions than the player character. This raises some tactical issues for the player, because those tools are literally not at your own disposal. They apparently didn’t teach the advanced LAYING ON THE FUCKING GROUND tactics at ISA boot camp. How the hell did they ever expect to win a war against such an advanced military might as the Helghast, what with their inhuman ability to KNEEL?!


Best skill in the game... of life.

Why game companies allow AI opponents to have access to a wider variety of abilities is beyond me. Maybe it’s a matter of complex controls, however after playing Mirror’s Edge, I know for a fact some relatively complex (and amazing) moves are capable (and easy to understand) in a first person perspective specifically (hell, CoD4 just makes you hold the crouch button longer to go prone… hmm, novel concept, the “get closer to the ground button,” when held longer, makes you go closer… to the… ground… GENIUS!). Maybe it’s a matter of trying to make a game more challenging, but what it really does is prove super frustrating AND send a clear message that the game could have been better than it is. The controls could have been more refined, ideas could have been fleshed out, etc. Going prone, tucking/rolling, blindfiring would have made KZ2 a better game to play there is no doubt about it. I don’t even think it arguable, quite honestly.

If Guerilla wanted their game to be truly original and memorable for more than its graphical prowess, then they should have taken the time to even the playing field while simultaneously expanding it to provide an even better playing and realistic experience (not to mention allow the same maneuvers in multiplayer matches). I understand this would have taken some more clarity on their part in terms of what experience they wanted to provide the player with (i.e. either including first person cutscenes or providing a third person cover camera and/or adding the same maneuverability for players) but I think it would have proven its worth tenfold.

Clearly the game’s sales numbers mean Guerilla has no reason to care about what I have to say at all, but maybe, just maybe, if they’re listening they will realize they missed some easily obtainable opportunities for greatness.

/Rant

Thoughts?

PS - Fuck me, I dunno how to resize photos on this site anymore... damn it.

So, this week my blog reviews return for some fairy tale lovin' and the PS3's latest killer app! This review covers Prince of Persia and Killzone 2. Enjoy.

Prince of Persia

The only PoP game I had ever played before the current-gen title was Warrior Within back on the Xbox. And, while I liked it, I wasn’t blown away by it. Luckily Prince of Persia totally blew it out of the water in terms of story, art design, pretty much everything about the latest PoP screams quality. It easily stands as one of the most memorable titles of the last year or two.

From the moment I started the game up I knew I was in for a treat. The graphics are what I consider magical. They sucked me into the game world and never let me go. I often called to my ex-girlfriend (we were dating at the time I played through it) and told her to come watch because I felt like I was playing a fairy tale. The fact the engine held up the entire game without a hitch of slowdown was a testament to Ubisoft. To me, the game world was as enchanting, if not more so, than my favorite atmospheric game of all time, Shadow of the Colossus, and that’s saying A LOT.


Truly fantastic character design right here, folks.

The one thing I didn’t like quite as much as the gameplay itself. No matter how you look at it the whole game is really just one giant series of QTEs with some fights thrown in to mix it up, which themselves quickly devolve into a smaller series of more frustrating QTEs after your enemies start blocking with more frequency. Sure, you look awesome as you do everything, but there was never a point outside a fight that allows you to truly do anything you want (and as stated before, fights quickly become a series of more QTEs anyway). If you want to go somewhere, you have to do exactly what the game wants you to exactly when it wants you to. The fact you never die just goes to cement the fact that, to me, you don’t “play” PoP, it leads you down a corridor and holds your hand the entire time, making sure you see everything it wants you to with little free will on behalf of the player. It’s worse than BioShock, in my opinion. At least in BioShock they used that tactic as a plot twist. Everything you see is gorgeous and everything, it just can’t be mistaken for a non-linear game. You choose where to go, but everything else is in the hands of the game. I still liked it, but it has to be noted.

The inclusion of Elika (aka the “Y” button… fitting) was a mixed bag for me. Sure she was attractive for a female videogame character and some of the banter between her and the Prince is legitimately heartfelt and at times funny, but it often annoyed me when I wanted to go somewhere and I’d have to wait for her to catch up. The chick can fly and whip you around levels by the end and shoots magic out her hands but she never learned how to cling to vines. Odd design choice.


I'd press his Y, if ya know what I mean.

The story itself was somewhat forgettable, but the manner in which it was presented was certainly enjoyable (the “ending” sequence was fantastic). The main enemies were amazing designs and often sad to have to kill, but they posed an interesting threat and the game made me want to learn more about them before their falls from grace. I’m more excited to see how Ubisoft can flesh out the story for the next game in the series than anything else (and maybe give us a few more places where we can do whatever we want, to boot).

Quick ass review score: 8/10

Killzone 2

Killzone 2 is what the PS3 was made for. This is the game that made my system earn its spot on my entertainment center (forgive me, for I haven’t played Uncharted yet, haha). Up until KZ2 my PS3 has mainly been a Bluray player. Not anymore. Now it is a legit piece of gaming hardware that deserves all the accolades it garners. Good job, Guerilla.


All simultaneously playable next time, maybe, please?

Having never played the first KZ title, I was a bit worried going into KZ2 that I’d miss something. The only thing I ended up missing were hours in my day because I’d play for such long lengths of time. The story in KZ2 is pretty basic realistic/futuristic science fiction, but the way it’s presented is truly commendable. The levels are fast-paced, offer a decent amount of variety, and do a better job of hiding enemy spawning than even CoD4 did, something that constantly annoyed the shit out of me in that title. It offered a decent challenge, fantastic weapons, and nice diversionary sequences with tanks and a kickass mech. Good stuff. The only complaint I have is that the check points were somewhat misbalanced at times. Sometimes coming every 3 minutes, other times requiring 10-15 minutes worth of progress to be lost.

The controls in KZ2 have gotten a lot of flack, but I can honestly say I have grown accustomed to them. I think people jumped on the “hate the controls” bandwagon before giving themselves time to get used to them, much like what happened with GTAIV. All it takes is a few hours online, though, and everything becomes second nature. I mean, I can now hop online and slay bitches with the best of ‘em and boy do I enjoy slaying bitches. The multiplayer is absolutely fantastic. The ranking system rewards quality play and the manner in which objective game types switch on the fly is ingenious. It forces you to stay on your toes if you want to win and keeps things fresh throughout your play time. It even throws in some interesting twists on objective/class-based play with cool little touches like special ability swapping, squads, and squad spawning, all things I have never seen in an online game (maybe I’m just behind the times). Guerilla should also be commended for keeping the graphical fidelity in multiplayer on par with the single player and the net code smooth. I’ve rarely experienced slowdown during play, which is more than can be said for the vast majority of other online shooters out there. If there is anything I find unfair it’s that Helghast players tend to stand out more due to their giant red glowing eyes than the ISA players. I’ve sniped quite a few people from across the map solely because I could hone in on their heads more easily. Oh well. They should have been ISA, haha.


Truly iconic. Good work.

In the end, Guerilla games have created the current killer app for Sony’s big black box of Bluray. It’s a must-purchase for every PS3 owner out there and is a tremendous value. I must admit I can’t wait to play KZ3 seeing how fantastic Guerilla has handled KZ2, if only for the fact I want a co-op campaign. What’s here is downright amazing, though, and should not be missed.

Quick ass review score: 10/10

Thanks for reading!

Next up will be de Blob and Condemned 2: Bloodshot.


**All images provided by/found via Google Image Search.**

So, this week my blog reviews return for a double whammy! This review covers Mercenaries 2 and Ratchet & Clank Future: Tools of Destruction. Enjoy.

Mercenaries 2

I never played the first Mercenaries title last generation, but had friends who enjoyed it. I played a demo on Xbox but was never enthralled with the idea of a war-time GTA. The sequel sounded more promising with a giant open world, the ability to lay waste to whole cities, etc. Unfortunately, the execution was so poor I gave up a few scant hours in.

The controls sucked, the graphics looked worse than some Wii titles I’ve played, the gameplay had almost zero variety, and the story and dialog were laughable at best and shameful at worst. I played through some of the missions in co-op with a friend and managed to get the majority of the Achievements without having to do much of anything, so I sent it back to GameFly within a week.


This character is in no way ironic and the game is sadder because of it.

Ho-hum. If you gaming hours are limited like mine, they can be spent on much better experiences of a similar nature including, but not limited to, Saint’s Row 2 and even GTAIV. Yeah, I liked GTAIV more than Mercs 2 and I HATED GTAIV. That should tell you something right there.

Quick ass review score: 4/10

Ratchet & Clank Future: Tools of Destruction

Yeah. I got a PS3. How crazy is that? (B-Radicate if ya wanna friend me, by the way.) So this is my first PS3 review. Cool. Now read on.

As a HUGE fan of the R&C titles since the first on the PS2, I knew Tools of Destruction would have to be not only my first PS3 game purchase, but also my first play through. There was never a doubt. Luckily the game retained all the fun and humor of last generation’s titles however I was a bit upset with how little the title pushed the series forward.

So, seeing as I’ve played every R&C titles to grace the PS2 (except for the PSP port) I went into ToD knowing the basics of what to expect: gorgeous graphics, a fun storyline with great characters and voice work, and a bevy of weapons with which to assault my foes. Where the title failed me was in the actual execution of the mechanics.

One thing I’ve noticed throughout the R&C series lifespan, and something I’ve grown to hate, is how Insomniac cycles through game mechanics. One title is all weapons and platforming, another has a customizable spaceship with loads of space flight side mission, others have loads of arena battles, one has multiplayer, etc. The problem is none of them have ALL of the proven game mechanics. They cherry pick which ones to cobble together and make a game with instead of polishing everything all at once and presenting a truly outstanding and varied experience. What’s worse is that beyond Sixaxis controls, the game literally doesn’t introduce anything new to the series or the genre. A hugely wasted opportunity to show us everything the PS3 would now allow the developers to create.


Sure, it looks nice, but if you've played a R&C title, you've seen and done it all before, sadly.

It annoyed me to no end that ToD didn’t have a multiplayer component (especially considering Insomniac clearly had a handle on PS3 online play with the release of Resistance). Instead of the system shipping almost out the gates with a great 3rd person action shooter (albeit of the more cartoony variety) they stripped the title down to its most basic form since the original title (a grand game, by all means, but showing its age in the wake of superior sequels), which is okay if you want to be the GTAIV of the action platforming genre (zing). However much I disliked GTAIV’s decision to remove a lot of the variety that made me love it, it made those concessions in order to completely overhaul the strength and breadth of the storyline, something R&C didn’t do or even try. It delivered a fun narrative, sure, but it wasn’t revolutionary by any means. It wasn’t even the best R&C story, if you ask me.

It also annoyed me that corners were cut in terms of playability to showcase Sixaxis controls. The ball rolling door unlock mini-game was like hell until I realized I could turn the motion control off and play the game like a sane person. I was also pissed the guns, when evolving, didn’t change shape/form until the very last level. A small thing to nitpick, but after playing the first game that included the weapon experience system (forgive me, they all sort of blend together in my head) and having the sheer joy rush through me when my rocket launcher just grew a new silo, or my shotgun grew beefier, it was sad to only have the thrill reflected in some numerical statistics which meant very little to me.

All in all, I think the title was made more to let R&C fans that Insomniac knows the hardware, knows we want more R&C, and was building a base engine in order to deliver newer better titles in the series’ (and system’s) futures. Ratchet & Clank Future is a fitting name change, to say the least. Maybe next time...

Quick ass review score: 7/10

Thanks for reading!

Next up will be Prince of Persia and Killzone 2.


**All images provided by/found via Google Image Search.**

So, this week my blog reviews return. This time I tackle everyone's favorite free running hottie and the game everyone loves to hate. Enjoy.

Mirror’s Edge

Mirror’s Edge is game I really wanted to like from the very first time I saw it. I’m a huge sucker for games that try new things or adapt certain mechanics for unconventional means. A first-person action platformer, a genre traditionally reserved for third person games (and arguably rarely done well anymore), is one such type of mechanic/perspective switch that interests me to no end by default. Luckily the game didn’t disappoint me in the grand scheme of things.

The key to ME (fuck yeah I abbreviate shit) working for me was always going to be the controls and the fluidity of the action. I feel the results were sort of mixed. The controls on one hand were as simple as pie to wrap my head around. They became second nature within an hour or so. However, the actual game’s fluidity was archaic at best.


Too bad you can't actually do that.

I do believe part of the reason I had trouble adapting to what the game requires is because we rarely, if ever, have played a game with such open mechanics. You can jump off, run across, boost over, etc. over almost anything in the game. That’s new. Getting my brain to think outside the box in terms of what the game would allow me to do was a big step. I was often stuck places because I didn’t always realize I should even consider some crazy run-jump-swing combo, which is admittedly more my fault than the game’s fault. However, this fell apart after I made the mental leap and did begin to think more acrobatically (so to speak) when I would be slapped in the face with a maneuver that the game would let me do. Wait, I can run up the side of buildings and leap and bound like a gazelle but I can’t jump over that shrub? Or box? Huh? It pretty much made me hope DICE gets another chance to try and marry the controls and play style to a more polished sequel with an even more robust list of moves available.


Oh. Hai.

The story was meh but should have been much longer. The in-game graphics were awesome. The cut scenes wanted to be an Esurance commercial but couldn’t if they tried. I’m not a huge fan of racing games and an even lesser fan of time trials in games, so the “additional” game modes were not very thrilling to me in the slightest. I played a few until I realized I could spend my time better elsewhere.

Quick ass review score: 7/10

Too Human

Too Human is a game I have followed through all of its development announcements and eventual woes. I am a huge fan of ancient mythology, with Egyptian and Norse being my two favorites. Getting a Norse-themed game drenched in futuristic technology was just too much for me to handle. I was steadily a giddy schoolgirl every time a new announcement was made. Then Denis Dyack decided to be a douche and ruin any hope the public had of giving the game a fair shake. I held out on passing judgment until I played the game myself and I’m glad I didn’t buy into the hype because, despite Too Human wasn’t the epic RPG experience Dyack and company claimed, it was a fun hack ‘n slash adventure with some gameplay quirks that were worth looking past.

The control and camera system are the two things people will be torn between loving and hating while playing the game. The attack controls were pretty much all mapped to the right analog stick, which is usually reserved for camera controls (more on that in a minute). The idea was that moving the stick in a direction would let you attack enemies in that direction and it worked pretty effectively. After a few hours I learned that some finesse with holding and flicking the stick allowed for more powerful combos. Laying waste to an entire mob of goblins never got old (although the goblin designs did) and I had fun throughout.


Fuck you.

Speaking of fun, when I played I was REALLY in the mood for a hack ‘n slash game where I could level up and equip crazy weapons and armor and lay waste to goons. TH delivered that experience in spades. I ran around with giant hammers and swords, whippin’ out pistols and laser rifles, slaying countless enemies. The augmentation of weapons and armors could have been more fluid, but I got a hang of it an hour or so in, so it didn’t prove too big of an issue by the end.

The camera really wanted to be cinematic but often failed. For a game that tried to be so epic in scope, you were often fighting in close cramped quarters and the camera took a shit on you in the middle of a battle more often than not, which was sad to say the least. Having to press two buttons to manually move the camera was just not acceptable in the heat of battle.

And how heated the battles got! Often times I would run into a room and simply get slaughtered. Enemies would attack you while down (or standing back up) and barrage you with attacks. There was often no chance at tactical reasoning. A lot has been said of the Valkyrie death animation, so I won’t speak to it, however I will say that I have come to believe that if a game starts you back exactly where you left off after dying it is blatantly telling you the developers KNEW you’d have no chance of making it through certain sections. That reeks of bad mechanics, bad development, or a combination of the two. Games shouldn’t be hard because the game literally won’t let you through a section without dying two or three times. They should be hard because it takes thought on the behalf of the player to navigate the gamescape. Too Human was more the former than the latter, sadly.


If only you could actually wield both at once, maybe they would have given us a traditional control scheme.

The graphics were decent, despite Silicon Knights’ hatred of the Unreal engine. The in-game graphics weren’t stunning but they got the job done. You were often running around with a giant hammer smacking shit in the face. How gorgeous does it need to be (and it was gorgeous artistically speaking)? However, the use of the in-game engine for the cut scenes showed how powerful the engine could be. I was often taken aback by the fidelity of the cut scenes. I drew the conclusion the engine was great for a game… just not this one. The camera would need to be closer to the character to show off the graphics, which TH didn’t do.

Sadly the game’s creators were so assured the game would “change the way we play games” and that it would warrant a number of sequels that they didn’t bother tying the game’s narrative threads together by the end, instead leaving it open to the sequels that at this point will likely never see the light of day. That’s sad because the best part of the whole story was the last series of cut scenes setting up the coming action. Sigh.

Quick ass review score: 6/10

Thanks for reading!

Up next will be Mercenaries 2 and Ratchet & Clank Future: Tools of Destruction. Stay tuned.


**All images provided by/found via Google Image Search.**