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About Me
First off is my highest honour -- my shit on the front page of Destructoid.


I was born back in the days of yore, when 3-D graphics were only a dream.

I like games.

Super Nintendo had to be one of the best consoles. Mario, Metroid, Link, Kirby, Donkey Kong and everyone else came to the party. Good times.

I own a Super Nintendo, N64, Gamecube, Wii, PS1, PS2, PSP, Xbox, Xbox 360, Gameboy Pocket, Gameboy Color, Gameboy Advance, and a DS.

I regret missing some of the good old days, back in the early 90's, because I was too young to appreciate a good game when it smacked me in the face. Such is the folly of youth.

Somedays I wish I could have lived through such tumultuous times, what with the advent of Spandex tights and Rap, but then I think that it is much better to live longer and be younger than all of you people who did enjoy Super Metroid and Mario Kart in it's heyday and just be content with an emulator and a Xbox 360 controller.


Favorite Games: Mario series, Donkey Kong Country/64, Metroid series, Legend of Zelda series, Fable, Halo series, Shadow of the Colossus, GTA series, God of War 1 and 2, Morrowind, Oblivion, Tales of Symphonia, Final Fantasy X, Banjo Kazooie/Tooie and more that I can't recall.


Send me a friends request if you dare, just send a message telling me you're from Destructoid so I don't think you're a 63 year old pedophile masquerading as a teenage girl to lure gullible, young boys to your basement. And if that description both fits you and you are from Destructoid then expect to recieve my home phone number and address.

Update: One year later

New games I would add to my favorites are Gears of Wars series, Fallout 3, Mass Effect, Bioshock (hey, I was playing it when I joined!), and other games I cannot recall. Some games I have loved for a long time but forgot to list over a year ago are Rome: Total War, the top Mario games, and the main Pokemon GB games. The rest escape me at this time.



So these days God no longer compels you to blog, Atlas is Fontaine, and generally speaking I am pretty well known around these parts. (I hope) I regret not joining Destructoid sooner, when I first had the chance with a link from Chad Concelmo's IGN blog. Even he was born in the primordial soup IGN was, or so it would seem. I no longer frequent there or other gaming sites except from time to time because Destructoid is hopefully my internet home from here on out. A great place to be, cheers to another year at Destructoid!

Update: Another year later

Okay, so year three isn't going that great. I haven't blogged for six months and have barely visited the site. In fact, it is nearly November and my 2 years happened almost 2 months ago in early September. Damn life, going outside into the real world is time consuming! I haven't even turned on a videogame since April... (until just recently!) But of course I haven't forgotten about Dtoid; THE GREATEST SITE ON THE WEB! Sorry Dtoid, I will try to live less and Dtoid more.

Update: Another few years later

So life hit me... I still visit this site when I can... to think I started visiting this site when I was 15, and made an account two weeks after I turned 16... I'm 20 now, Destructoid is practically part of my life story at this point, even if I disappear for years at a time. Still, I remember the good old days, the days when Dtoid was like the Wild West, when I was at my most active, and when we would open the gates of Hell in our mischief, always walking on the edge of the banhammer. Now I'm just an ancient, obscure memory to the last surviving cowboys, a group even to this day I feel I'm a part of. Still, I raise my glass to you. Good times Destructoid, good times!

Oh, and to a few of us oldsters, Atlas is Fontaine.

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The Official Atlastoid "Why I Was Gone Two Months" (and why nobody missed me)
Atlas | 12:16 AM on 08.29.2008 27 comments


So, I was gone for two months, with no contact with Destructoid. Some of you more veteran D-toiders may remember me as the "guy who spoiled Bioshock for all those noobs who hadn't played it", and i'm sure you DON'T remember that I have been gone for two month.

Well, the truth is I have been in a radical treatment for a terminal cancer and this is my final send off. I have been too busy and tired to visit Destructoid and just wanted to say that this is goodbye....

Actually, I am just a prick. After all, I AM Frank Fontaine


So anyways, I just really have been busy with work and shit. What have I missed? Anyone actually remember me, or my critically acclaimed articles?

Anyone?



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26 comments | showing # 1 to 26
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MrSadistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 00:33
MrSadistic
Some enemies became friends, some friends became enemies. Heretic got banned, but then he came back like some sort of minority Jesus, some people became Dtoid editors, I got my first period, and we're all out of milk and sex.
Atlas's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 00:39
Atlas
What did Heretic do?
Puppy Licks's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 00:47
Puppy Licks
Hey I was just wondering today where you went off to.

I have two words that'll sum up what you missed:
Eternity's Child :)
Atlas's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 00:51
Atlas
For the love of God could you divulge what "Eternity's Child" is?
MechaMonkey's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 00:55
MechaMonkey
We discovered that Jim Sterling is in fact WiiSucks.
Krow's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 00:57
Krow
I missed you.

Nice to meet you by the way.
Atlas's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 01:04
Atlas
Well played Mr. Destructoid, well played.

Also, Mechamonkey is a dirty liar.
nebones's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 01:24
nebones
I lost my virginity
Justin Villasenor's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 01:27
Justin Villasenor
Oh dude, sorry about the cancer, I can't believe that ... hey, wait a minute.
ArrestedDeveloper's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 01:28
ArrestedDeveloper
Ron quit and we found out Bfeld is 7 years sold.
Kyousuke Nanbu's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 01:32
Kyousuke Nanbu
Heretic was banned?

Wow, I thought nobody got banned in this place, I am truly shocked.

And you should have stayed gone Atlas :)
Chaosye's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 01:40
Chaosye
@Kyousuke
WiiSucks got banned.
But that was cause he was WiiSucks.
nebones's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 04:20
nebones
And then I lost my virginity, again.
Koobert's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 05:54
Koobert
I would have, you know, missed you but I think the last time I posted was about two months ago as well... just had other things on my mind, work, etcetera.
RonBurgandy2010's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 06:23
RonBurgandy2010
I embarrassed myself on Nintendoll's blog.

Also, your avatar seems familiar.
ZServ's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 06:39
ZServ
guys, The_Wrath also got banned :P
aborto thefetus's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 08:22
aborto thefetus
I was just wondering where you went yesterday.

Also, you just missed the great dolphin/shark debate.
Elitechief27's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 09:22
Elitechief27
You missed the braid fap fest, and you missed The Horrors that is Dennis Dydack
Holyetheline's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 10:29
Holyetheline
You don't seem like that much of a prick?
Def JM's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 11:51
Def JM
I thought I had the herp but, it was just posion ivy. And yes I do remember said Atlas.
kaciesaurus's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 11:54
kaciesaurus
I remember you.
Aaron Mxy Yost's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 12:10
Aaron Mxy Yost
Oh hai there Atlas!
commish's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 13:25
commish
A Wild Atlas Re-Appears! Catch jim, don't let him get away
I made a big forum thread about the rise and fall of Dtoid, got some good discussion going. It turned into a charizard vs blastoise debate
demonelite's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 16:12
demonelite
Welcome back Atlas!

Nobody misses me when I am gone :(
RonBurgandy2010's Avatar - Comment posted on 08/29/2008 16:13
RonBurgandy2010
Who the hell are you?
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