Contestoid: Tekken 6 Swag

Lee Chaolan. the "I want to be a accepted" Mishima. At least he used to be so. After realizing Kazuya was too much of a pimp with his purple suit, he went completely missing in Tekken 3. Thought off to be dead and killed by Ogre, Lee returns in Tekken 4 disguised as violet. Now looking even more non mishima and more of the "rico suave" Kazuya could ever be, he's returned to get all the females he can from those evil Mishimas.

of course this doesn't work as the mishimas continue to take their turns with the King of the Iron fist whores Nina and Anna. Tekken 6 sees Kazuya pimping Anna and Jin pimping Nina. Along with that, Jin has his cousin Asuka and friend Xiaoyu chasing after him for their own reasons. Then there's the men who go gay for Jin such as Miguel, Eddy, Raven. Lee doesn't look like he's ever going to get that female he oh so desires.

In turn of this, Lee skips out on the King of the Iron fist tournament 6 and creates The King of the Iron volleyball in his own spin off tournament for the men and ladies. On his own private island, he invites all females to the island for the Tekken beach ball madness in hopes of wooing the winner of said team.

Leo: Once upon a time in a dark, stormy Namco headquarters a lonely female character designer got horny. The End.

Kazuya was once a budding homosexual. He developed daddy issues not because Heihachi dropped him off a gaddamn cliff, but because Heihachi doesn't listen to what Kazuya. He found strong male figures in other men such as Bruce Irwin, King and Paul Phoenix; men that he perceives would give him that someone strong to rely on. Of all the men in his life, Paul Phoenix was the one he loved dearly. Both of them yearned for a "rival", someone that would compliment one's self. They found that in each others arms. But alas, they were starcrossed. When Kazuya fought Heihachi in the second King of the Iron Fist tournament, Kazuya was defeated and was jettisoned to a volcano. Not even Angel, the manifestation of Kazuya's femininity could save him. Paul was emotionally shattered. 20 years later Kazuya resurfaced, straighter than Chuck Norris can ever be. Unknown to everyone, Kazuya underwent dehomosexualization under some Christian priests as part of G Corporation's rehabilitation program for him. Ironically, Devil was kept inside Kazuya because he was straight while Angel was exorcised because she made Kazuya gay. Paul was embittered when he found out that Kazuya was straight because the memories that he held on so dearly was destroyed before his very eyes. So with renewed determination, Paul Phoenix once again tries to fight his "rival" in every tournament held, hoping he would be the "top" again over Kazuya. All along, Kazuya was suppressing his feelings for Paul that are trying to come out once again...

Shin Oni has the first comment on a Tekken contest blog....

LEO: King from the "King of Fighters" series was tired of fireballs and super moves. Shit was lame. So, she decided to apply as a character for the upcoming Tekken 6. She was denied. "We already have a King", they said, waving a photo of some fucked up leopard man thing.

"Please, I really need this." sobbed King, crying like a little bitch. Annoyed, and wanting to get this crazy woman out of their office ASAP, the Tekken execs decided "Fine, but we'll need to change your name."

"That's Fine!" exclaimed King. "Thank You! Thank You!"

And so, Leo was introduced to Tekken 6's roster. But the execs harbored ill will towards her because of her pathetic behavior during their first meeting, so they gave her one of the shittiest movesets in the game.

King: lived in the jungle until he had learned how to suplex a rhino, got dressed and when on to the tekken tournament. Which sadly had no rhinos.

King: Beneath king's mask is the face of the world most wanted pedophile who is known to "wrestle" with the kids and loves to "piledrive" them.

HULK SMASH!

Armor King: One day, a Mexican-Japanese man by the name of Oreos McBiscuitcrisp was walking down a strip of lowly run-down shops looking for a new microwave. As he was walking down the strip, he said to himself, "Que?" as he stared at this magnificent box that continued to show sparkly colors depicting his hero: A man in a mask by the name of "El Luchadoor". His mask was in the shape of a door, which he used for his "Open Door Policy" finisher. But, these colors didn't depict El Luchadoor winning. No, he was getting slammed by an upcoming Wrestler, El Cerrajero (The Locksmith, lol.). In his hope to defend his honor, Oreos ran to an alley, got some scrap metal, killed a jaguar and took its head as a mask, and made a wrestling costume out of this so that he could enter The King of Iron Fist Tournament to hone his skills so that he could finally face off with El Cerrajero to defend El Luchadoor's honor.

Also, he has a red eye due to lack of minerals in the ecosystem's water supply.
Also, scorpions.

P.S. I know nothing of the Spanish culture/language.

lmao cataract. It's those black senses tingling.

Once upon a time ...I want that shirt. The End.

There once was a man called..wheres my copy of godfather 2 mcphanus :(

One day after the Tekken Tournament Jin decided he was bored from being a evil douchey warlord he decided to browse teh interwebs. Being like any curios person he decideds to look up google images of himself but he would learn that wasn't the best idea in the world. He got bored very fast at seeing himself drawn shirtless over and over again, he decided to look up pictures of him and his long time rival Hwoarang but that was a big mistake. Upon the loading of the first page to Jin's horror many of these pictures were of him and Hwoarang making out and various other sexual poses and what not. Thinking it would get better on the second page but again wrong! It seems that this page and more graphic drawings of the two going at it, one picture pictured them in some sort of bondage playroom with Hwoarang on top and Jin tied to a table. Jin had seen enough, he clicked out of the window, got up from his computer and walked away. He then proceeded to go wash eyes his out.

Bryan Fury left the set of 28 days later, deciding he wanted to more than just a "zombie extra". He traveled the corners of the earth looking for any challenges he could find, but being a zombie, they were few and far between. So Bryan signed up for the Peace Corp to bring peace and rainbows to all the countries in need, only to be informed there was a zombie hunter by the name of Frank West in Burma covering wars and stuff, ya know. Deciding to preemptively take out this hunter of zombies, he invited West to a dance off. After two hours of non-stop boogieing, both were tired of dancing. Fury, in a last ditch effort to one up West's truffle shuffle decided to do a jump kick into a split a la Van Damme. The kick accidentally'd Frank and it was at this moment that Bryan Fury found his true calling, fighting. Rambo, also in Burma rescuing some missionaries(watch da movie), informed Fury of a tournament that allowed zombies, kangaroos, and even robots fight each other for the ultimate title. This tournament was known as Tekken. Bryan Fury made his way to the third tournament, also known as Tekken 3.

@wilbo:
I sent it to you ages ago. Did you never receive it? I'll have to chase up Royal Mail.... fuckers :-(

There was a tekken fighter called Lee
Who went to the loo in the sea
He bumped into paul
Who play with one ball
and he forgot he needed a wee

There was a tekken fighter called Jin
Who woke up drunk in a bin
In such a rant
he pissed his pant
and carried on drinking in sin

lol @ Malcor!

Congrats to LazyEyelids for being crowned the winner! but DtoidUK's very own nikmonroe has some Tekken swag to give away as well which goes to the runner up Shin Oni!

Congrats guys! Check your inboxes as PMs are inbound :-D