My relationship with Square-Enix. - Destructoid

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Hello and greetings, my name is Brett and I am an artist and also a nerd. I am on a quest to gain infamy, and I am all over the internet in many fine and not-so-fine places!


I created a terrible, NSFW 12-page comic called Dream Dive. It's not porn, but it would probably suck less if it were. Or more. I don't know.

I also made a terrible stop-motion video called Godzilla Versus the Zoids as an excuse to burn some model houses from an old art class a few years back.

Favorite games include:
Shadow of the Colossus
No More Heroes
Panzer Dragoon Orta
Sin & Punishment
Jet Set Radio Future
God of War 2
Contra: Shattered Soldier
Metroid Prime
The World Ends With You

My game collection

AIM: Animated Trigger

Just about anything else about me can be found out from that horrible Myspace link, yes. Now bow to me.

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This morning, after 23 awesome hours, I beat the World Ends With You. Okay, I confess, I had to switch to Easy mode on the final boss battle after it killed me multiple times because I had two useless pins equipped plus my level dropped down, but I beat it nevertheless and it is one of the best effing DS games ever that every DS-owner should go out and buy because I said so.

But something hit me once the credits started rolling: This is only the second Square game I’ve ever beaten! Yes, I know they’re Square-Enix/Squeenix now, but I don’t know who these Enix people are and the portion of my brain that still thinks it’s the late 90’s keeps referring to them as Squaresoft, but bear with me here.

The only other Square game I’ve ever beaten is Kingdom Hearts 2, which is pretty bad considering just how many Square games I’ve owned and/or played in my lifetime.

I went over the list in my head: SaGa Frontier (the first Playstation game I bought with my own money as a kid, before I even had a memory card, stupid me), Final Fantasy IV, V, VI, VII, VIII, XII, and Tactics, Chrono Trigger, Brave Fencer Musashi, Samurai Legend Musashi, Kingdom Hearts, Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories, and probably some others that have slipped my mind.

I never beat a single one of those. I feel like a loser.

I don’t know what it is about those games. It’s certainly not because they suck, everything of theirs I play is pretty amazing! I mean, it is partially because I’ve never beaten a traditional JRPG and probably never will finish one to save my life, but then…why did I never finish Chain of Memories? I know I was close to the end! Same goes for Brave Fencer Musashi, and that was one of my favorite damn Playstation games ever! And FFXII, I’ve put over 50 hours into it and still haven’t finished it, mostly because I keep buying other games for my Wii and can’t be buggered to constantly unplug one system to play the other. Also possibly because I bought FFVI at the same time on the GBA and playing two Final Fantasy games at the same time is a horrible, horrible idea…

So it seems that Square-Enix and I have a bizarre relationship. I know now that with the exception of something truly unique like the World Ends With You, I can never finish any of their games. Is this some kind of curse? I’ve been well aware of this fact for some time now, actually, and yet I can’t stop buying their games. What is wrong with me? Is there some sort of cure?

I aim to get a PS3 some time in the future, after Team Ico’s new project and God of War 3 are released probably, and man, both those Final Fantasy XIII titles look shweet, but I know that those too would sit unfinished should I buy them…what am I to do?

I can’t be the only one with this problem, can I?

Also, go play the World Ends With You. NOW.
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Living the dream since March 16, 2006

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