So, like everyone else, I picked up Brawl on midnight Saturday night. Or Sunday morning. Whatever, time never made much sense to me. I’ve been playing the hell out of it and enjoying every moment of it.

I tried the online deal yesterday with my friend, and he and I had many epic brawls before tiring out and exchanging levels we’d made and pictures we took, which is incredibly fun and highly recommended.

After he logged off though, I decided to give Spectator mode a try. It’s actually kind of neat. I lost a lot of coins because no one knows how to play as Bowser or Falco it seems, but I also got lucky and managed to nab back most of my lost coins on a few close matches that were a lot of fun to watch.

And then the game offers me a “Bonus Chance,” that is, the opportunity to make a shit ton more coins than your normally would win upon placing a bet. So I agreed, the line up was Snake versus Snake versus Captain Falcon versus Falco. I put my coins on Captain Falcon.

…And then the battle began, and I wanted to hurl something at my TV.

The game didn’t mess up, it wasn’t lag or anything like that, but the fight was not a fight at all…it was 2 minutes of IDIOCY. I don’t think there were actual people playing, I think someone just handed 4 controllers over to some chimps that had been hit in the head a few times. All they did was jump up and down, taunt, jump some more, run around, and jump even more. And Captain Falcon broke his own shield, both Snakes killed themselves at one point, and I just wanted to cry. My “Bonus Chance” was wasted because some total retards got online to jump up and down on Final Destination and not actually, you know, FIGHT.

But then I wondered if any of mine and my friend’s fights were recorded, specifically the one where we both accidentally picked Snake and spent a good minute just getting in our boxes and shooting missiles at each other…

Regardless, I went into Spectator mode expecting to see wonderful examples of wanton douchebaggery and instead I got some cool matches and a shining example of what happens when the brain leaks out from your ears.

Hopefully it won’t happen again, but has anyone else encountered stuff like this?

Also, because I’m looking to play online with more people than just my one friend, and because the With Anyone function is currently broken, I offer you all my friend code, and should you decide to add me, leave yours in the comments I suppose:

Friend Code: 4811-6615-2769

I go by Edge on there. No, not like the wrestler. Be my friend, plz?