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Altered Beets's blog

3:50 AM on 11.27.2008

REAALLY LATE OT WEDNESDAY: Complete Juggling Lessons by Me!

Well, parts 1-3 anyway. Look. Geeks play video games. I suppose non-geeks do as well, but if there's one thing geeks are expected to do, it's play those video games. Also, people with too much spare time. But what do you...   read

12:08 PM on 11.25.2008

Gears of War II as Written by Terry Pratchett

The universe, conventionally speaking, does not have corners. It has curves. Curves that spin and drop and coil into an infinite patchwork of blackness. And in the upper left-hand corner of this blackness there is a world....   read

1:32 PM on 11.24.2008

Back in the Day Once More: THIS is Why I Brought A Wii

Hmm? Oh, I try to avoid the expression "back in the day," yeah. Being all "back in the day" automatically ages me, which would be fine if I were made of cheese. As I'm not, it suggests that I'm no longer in the day. Man...   read

2:54 AM on 11.21.2008

The Writers from "House MD" Solve "Sam and Max Hit the Road."

INT. HOSPITAL HALLWAY. DAY HOUSE is walking down a hospital hallway (set #02) when he is interrupted by CAMERON HOUSE: You're in my way. CAMERON (Handing him clipboard): We've got a dog and a rabbit, trying to get ins...   read

4:09 AM on 11.20.2008

The Ogopogo Mystery: How A Small Canadian Town Made Waves in Final Fantasy IV

When Final Fantasy IV left the localization team as Final Fantasy II back in 1991, a few small things were changed. Like removing the Tentacle Porn sidequest and changing Gorecap Bloodbane's name to G. Rubybn. References to...   read

3:49 PM on 11.19.2008

Missed opportunities: OT Wednesday

I had a really cool project all scheduled for this Off-Topic Wednesday, but it's not finished, so it'll have to wait until next week. Until then, here's something of my own that's very much in progress and totally unrelated ...   read

3:01 AM on 11.18.2008

My Cat is Having Trouble in Ninja Gaiden!

Okay, I'm at my wit's end here. One of the toughest parts of the original Ninja Gaiden is memorizing the appearance of birds. Birds have this incredible ability to just kill you instantly in mid-jump. As with the original ...   read

1:59 PM on 11.17.2008

The Hidden Cost of the Disk: An Argument FOR Digital Downloads

I wanted to look at where our games come from. Who makes them, physically, and under what conditions? How do they get to the store? How much oil is burned up getting them to the warehouse? Are disks even a sustainable for...   read

11:00 AM on 11.13.2008

We Believe Your Brother Luigi May Be Clinically Depressed

June 15, 1980 Yo, diary! Things are going great. My brother Mario wants to get a plumbing business going, seeing as how I just got my certification. Pauline and I are also getting along again, I think she might just be t...   read

11:14 AM on 11.12.2008

OT Wednesday: Logic Lessons or 7 Fanboy Fallacies and How to Spot Them

Alright, so this is only about 90% off-topic, so sue me. Please. I really want to experience the whole court-room drama thing. Just to stand up and shout, "Relevancy your Honour!" or "You're badgering the witness?" Hey, u...   read

1:51 AM on 11.12.2008

A Time to Build: The 3.5" Mix Tape (4 of 3)

Nobody read part 2, and even less nobody will read part 3, so I assume nobody at all will read part 4, even if forced into a room by Vanna White with a light saber. Given that, I figure, this is the place to put those things...   read

1:48 AM on 11.12.2008

A Time to Build: 3.5 Mix Tapes (Part 3 of 3)

In 1994, I spent nearly 100 Canadian dollars ordering the Pie in the Sky 3d Game Creation System. I don't think you understand how obsessed I was with sharing content. I owned a total of three FPS games, and that time, one....   read

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