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Alder B Dash's blog

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Alder B Dash avatar 9:00 PM on 04.28.2013  (server time)
Introduction - Answering the call to N00b C-bloggers

Oh, umm... Hey there Destructoid.

IÖ I didnít see you there. This isnít what it looks like. ThisÖ isÖ forÖ A ROLE! Yes! Hollywood is thinking of doing a What Women Want reboot and before I audition for the part Iím trying to get into the same frame of mind as a woman like Mel Gibson did in that one scene from the movie.

Well Iím glad youíre here because there is something Iíve been meaning to talk about. Now it seems there has been a bit of a trend lately of new people signing up on Destructoid, writing some blogs, and not introducing themselves. What kind of an ass joins a community of people, starts throwing up a bunch of words in peopleís faces, and doesnít have the common courtesy to say hi and let others learn a little about them?

Apparently, Iím one of those asses!

Now I donít like to toot my own horn. Thatís what I pay a random stranger from Craigslist to do. However, if people would like to learn a little about myself then who am I to deny the public what they want?

Iím in my mid-twenties and just so happen to have been born the same day as Danny DeVito. Some of you reading may be asking yourselves, ďWho gives a shit about Danny DeVitoĒ? Oh, give a shit you should. Give a lot of shits you should. Because, he just so happens to be on one of my favorite comedy shows, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Itís a show about awful, awful people and I love them all.

I highly recommend it.

Iím just a couple hoursí drive from Dtoid San Francisco. Sadly, I will not be going to PAX. I found Destructoid thanks to Jim Sterling when he started his Jimquisition videos over on The Escapist back in 2011 and occasionally browsed the articles here for a while, however, never bothered reading the comments or C-blogs. It is an understatement calling that a huge fucking mistake. Come for the articles, stay for the comments/community.

I think it wasnít until the Medal of Honor news broke that I burst onto the scene and made my first comment on Destructoid. When I noticed people were up-voting that joke I started taking a look at the other comments and realized Destructoid is why cavemen chiseled on walls. Everything throughout humanityís time on earth was merely leading up to Destructoid. I donít think science can prove that wrong, but then who would want to?

My first gaming device was the classic NES.

At my young age I knew walking out of the Toys "R" Us with this giant box was something good, but I didn't fully comprehend just what a big deal it was until my parents set it up and I got to play Super Mario, Duck Hunt, and Golf. My favorite games as a child during that time were Battletoads, Contra, Double Dragon, Mega Man 3, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III: The Manhattan Project.

That shit was my childhood crack.

I also had that brick sized GameBoy and while I didnít have many games for it at the time I just so happen to have had The Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening.

It was the game that popped my Zelda cherry and I forever love those games because of it. I thought for as long as I had played it my Game Boy would have died, yet surprisingly it never did even after the Game Boy Color was released. Remember everybody loosing their shit over that?! OMFG! Game BoyÖ IN COLOR!? What wizardry is this, Nintendo?!

I owned the turquoise one.

I was also an avid collector of videogame magazines. I couldnít own them all, but I owned a shit ton of them. I owned videogame magazines such as, Game Pro, Tips & Tricks, and Nintendo Power. Sadly, they all had to go because one day my family thought I was being a hoarder and demanded I free up some space on my bookshelves. Dicks.

Well that's a little about me, Destructoid. If any other n00b C-bloggers read this and didn't post an intro blog then you should do one as well before I pull out my giant icy penis and coldcock the lot of you.

Don't think I won't do it.

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