I am not going to buy this game unless I can have sex with everyone on my ship.

I will not buy this game unless there is a button mashing minigame called "Motorboating Ashley".

I will not buy this game unless all dialogue trees end with "Fancy a shag".

I will not buy this game unless I can have a threesome with Wrex and that Krogan chick. Hell, I'm not going to lie anymore. The chick was only there to make it seem less weird. I just want Wrex.

If they don't replace all the pointless, dull firefights with some good old fashioned hardcore alien pornography, they can kiss my money goodbye. I think it's so cute that they think anyone gives a damn about the story or the gameplay.