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Blizzard mocks Diablo purists with unicorns that poo rainbows photo

The controversy surrounding Diablo 3 has been utterly ridiculous, and nobody seems to know that more than the developer itself. Blizzard has been poking fun at purist "fans" who complained about the game's artistic style for a while now, and the joke has come to a head with these mocking screenshots.

As Diablo obsessives whine and moan that Diablo 3 isn't dark and ugly enough to be a proper sequel (even bitching about realistic rainbow effects), the game's community manager has poured several tanks of gasoline on the fire by showing fans two Diablo 3 screens with special enhanced features, such as unicorns that sh*t rainbows and a special "love spree" bonus meter. The results are quite hilarious, and will definitely take some of the snobby aggressors down a peg or two.

At least most of the Battle.net forums where these were posted found the situation funny and not some sort of grave insult. Personally, I feel that anybody who looks at that image of a demonic, mace-wielding Marshmallow Man without laughing should be covered in boiling hot marmalade and thrown into a nest of wasps.


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38 comments | showing # 1 to 38

Gyrael's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 20:04
Gyrael
Hahaha, genius.
MrSadistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 20:06
MrSadistic
if a Unicorn's shit tasted like Skittles, then I wouldn't mind.
Gen Eric Gui's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 20:12
Gen Eric Gui
...after being totally turned off by Diablo 2, I never thought I'd say this, but...

I want to play this game now.
GrumpyTurtle's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 20:13
GrumpyTurtle
It there was a game with Unicorns crapping deadly rainbows, I'd be all over it.
Xhumation's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 20:16
Xhumation
hahaha.

Delicious comedy overkill.
Midgetsnowman's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 20:18
Midgetsnowman
And this is why I still play WoW.

Say what you will about it being generic, Blizzard';s sense of humor is still riotously funny.
The-Excel's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 20:24
The-Excel
Blizzard's and Atlus USA's publicity teams need to meet up. Post-haste.
CocoJambo's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 20:27
CocoJambo
When is this coming out? I want this game so much. With or without colourful anal discharges.
Doomsday Forte's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 20:41
Doomsday Forte
Ehehehe. This is delicious lmaonade.

I wonder if this stuff would be in the game as an easter egg or something?
Dan CiTi's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 20:43
Dan CiTi
Thank god they are not giving in and making the game all grimdark.

Although this is not what makes me want to play the game, that's awesome.
Agent Orange's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 20:52
Agent Orange
As loltastic as these are, now I'm going to be upset if they don't include a mace-wielding marshmallow man.
sickNasty's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 20:53
sickNasty
"...should be covered in boiling hot marmalade and thrown into a nest of wasps."

how did you know my secret fetish?
grafkhun's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 20:53
grafkhun
Hysterical, Blizzard still has that sense of humor I see. Also, unicorns as playable characters, please?
ArrestedDeveloper's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 21:37
ArrestedDeveloper
ooo those stinkers.
hoyt414's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 21:41
hoyt414
YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST:

Secret rainbow-shitting unicorn/marshmallow man level.
B-Radicate's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 22:15
B-Radicate
Haha.

Blizzard: 1
Fucking morons: 0
Wexx's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 22:38
Wexx
Oh blizzard...

And yes, Rainbow shitting unicorns/marshmallow man level is the new Cow level, methinks.
John B's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 23:04
John B
{ standing ovation }
Gyrael's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 23:17
Gyrael
Gen Eric Gui's Avatar
Gen Eric Gui at 02/03/2009 20:12

...after being totally turned off by Diablo 2

I will kill you. Gruesomely.
whormongr's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/03/2009 23:19
whormongr
I'll play it if it has rainbow shitting unicorns
Vitamin Awesome's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 00:36
Vitamin Awesome
Welp, Blizzard just got a Day one purchase from me.
s0lesurviv0r's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 02:55
s0lesurviv0r
Hell yea, I always said Diablo needed some Lisa Frank!
ajaxender's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 03:06
ajaxender
Holy hell, that other pic of the marshmellow man is just gold. Id play the shit out of that game. I almost want it more than D3.
CallMeRotten's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 04:19
CallMeRotten
It still boggles the brain that so many actually bitched about the graphics. Blizzard can afford to dish out some digital titty twisters now though. If they put in Teddy Ruxpin as playable, millions would still buy Diablo III.
MatCD's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 05:22
MatCD
There is no secret unicorn level.
thunderleg's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 06:26
thunderleg
They should definitely make the tail lift up like a skunk before... uhh... emissions...? projections...?
CloneTrooper's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 06:49
CloneTrooper
Ahh Blizzard..

You know what...the Bethesda boys need to do something like this with Fallout...

Id love that.
zanthox's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 07:54
zanthox
Ahhh Blizzard, always so hilarious. I think they really are the best company to be so big they can piss all over their fans and not feel any real backlash because they amazing. Can't wait for D3, with or without rainbow pooping unicorns.
Ryee's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 08:12
Ryee
i hope the sailor suit will be armor you can acquire
Demtor's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 08:16
Demtor
Haha, thats great. I really hope they secretly put them in there like they did with the Cow level in D2.
Corak's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 10:36
Corak
That was amazing. I can only imagine how true Diablo fanboys will react over this. I can see/hear it now and it ain't pretty. But fuck them. This game looks great, blizzard has a good sense of humor, and a deadly rainbow shitting unicorn proved that. I've pretty much decided to upgrade my PC at around the time this game comes out. Even though I know the requirements shouldn't be astronomical, I want to be able to play it at its best.
ToxinBlackheart's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 10:57
ToxinBlackheart
I <3 Blizzard.

Reminds me of the good ol' classic Cow level.

I cannot wait for Diablo III.
Nixium's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 11:16
Nixium
GrumpyTurtle:

I couldn't agree more.

This is how I imagine it:

You are running around in Diable and suddenly your dead via a unicorn pooping rainbows on you and then they loot your corpse. ( I don't know if D3 will have player corpse looting)
Mirax's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 13:04
Mirax
Blizzard rules. People should stop complaining about this games, it looks really good and I can't wait to play it.
Timstuff's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 13:16
Timstuff
ROTFLOL! All this whining is like Fallout 3 all over again. A lot of the so-called "purists" to this day still think that Bethesda ruined the Fallout franchise.
silvain's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/04/2009 14:09
silvain
I would play a 2d puzzle platformer involving a rainbow-pooping unicorn.
Canucklehead's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/05/2009 20:45
Canucklehead
Next up, pixies that pee Hawaiian Punch!
gorba's Avatar - Comment posted on 02/06/2009 13:34
gorba
Blue: Hey, Charlie. Hey, Charlie, wake up.

Pink: Yeah, Charlie. You silly sleepy-head, wake up.

Charlie: (groans) Oh, God, you guys. This had better be pretty frickin' important. Is the meadow on fire?

Blue: No, Charlie. We found a map, to Candy Mountain, Candy Mountain, Charlie.

Pink: Yeah, Charlie, we're going to Candy Mountain. Come with us, Charlie.

Blue: Yeah, Charlie, it'll be an adventure. We're going on an adventure, Charlie.

Charlie: Yeah, Candy Mountain, right. I'm just gonna, you know, go back to sleep now.

Blue: (jumping onto Charlie's back) Noooo, Charlie. You have to come with us to Candy Mountain.

Pink: Yeah, Charlie, Candy Mountain. It's a land of sweets and joy ....and joyness.

Charlie: Please stop bouncing on me.

Blue: (still jumping up and down on Charlie) Candy Mountain, Charlie.

Pink: Yeah, Candy Mountain!

Charlie: Alright, fine! I'll come with you to Candy Mountain.
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