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I proudly present The Official Destructoid Theme Song Contest. After decades of trying to figure out a way to somehow turn this into a Photoshop contest, I finally crumbled and decided to just keep it musical. I know, I know … but don’t fret, I’m sure within the next day or two Ron will have his “Draw a giant mutant cock tentacle-raping Justin Murray’s face … in bed!” contest up and you can all hit your Wacoms for some intense, uh … wacking.

Anyway, hit the jump for the complete details and all the fancy prizes, but let me just warn you; this is only the beginning of melodious epicness. I can’t spill the proverbial beans quite yet, but let me just say that if you were a dog, and you knew what I knew, you’d totally be humping someone’s leg right now.

Grand Prize (1)

The Complete Xbox 360 Rock Band game (includes Drum, wireless Guitar, and Microphone)

...and your choice of Dtoid editor as groupie.

The If You’re Not First, You’re Last Prize (5)

Niero's Funtime Mystery Box

[This weekly reminder is courtesy of the fact that you got excited at first and then your ADD and drug habit kicked in and you forgot about all about our little contest. Yes Joe Burling, I'm talking to you.]

For those of you who are not familiar with the Dtoid theme, created by half-game half-Jew Jonathan Mann, here is the original version. And again, in acapella form. And once more, performed by D.A.G.

Now that you’ve got that burnt into your soul (you can try and scrub as hard you want, it’s not coming out), you get to make your own Destructoid theme song, or remix, or you can just spam Niero’s inbox with screaming interracial porn. [Editor's note: As if I don't get enough of that from Ron Workman -Niero]

There is no restriction on what genre(s) of music you choose, how much of the original song you actually include (whether it’s you, your computers robot voice, or the Jew himself singing), and no limit on how many entries you can submit. The song should be at least two minutes in length, up to a maximum of five minutes.

Submissions should be posted in the comments for all to hear, either as a link to the Megaupload URL, Youtube, or similar site. The last rule is that you have as much fun as humanly possible and create some shizzle that will rock the house later this year at the Destructoid Battle of th--- oh, you guys almost got me. Nice try suckers!

The deadline is 11:59 PM (PST), August 2nd. Winners will be selected by the Destructoid crew on August 3rd, and just know that if you don’t win then it was Jim Sterling who swayed the vote away from you, not the Mexicans as you may have otherwise hastily assumed. Meng.


Continue: More Rock Band stories





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next 50 comments

114 comments | showing # 1 to 50

BahamutZero's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 15:59
BahamutZero
and you know what's in the box? AIDS.
Truepatriot's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:02
Truepatriot
damnit anyone wanna loan me some talent?!?!?!
JJ Rage's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:06
JJ Rage
Fuck Rock Band, I want what's in the box.
BahamutZero's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:08
BahamutZero
JJ - enjoy your AIDS
galagabug 's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:08
galagabug
i know whats in the box...


nothing! absolutely nothing! you soooo stuuupid!
JJ Rage's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:13
JJ Rage
Yes! AIDS!



Wait...
Geoff's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:14
Geoff
Meng.
Sindicate's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:21
Sindicate
I M T3H W1NZ0RZ
Topher Cantler's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:24
Topher Cantler
Head asplode!
William Haley's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:24
William Haley


"Whats in the box?!"



"Nothing! You sooo stupid!"
tazarthayoot's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:27
tazarthayoot
I canz b singin if some1z bz playin da geetarz
Wedge's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:28
Wedge
Damn that is an awesome prize. Is Dale North inelligable? If OCRemix gets wind of this, could be some crazy entries c.c'
Niero's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:34
Niero
Nevermind what I said, I was wrong. The prize is the full $200 edition. Good luck!
TheBrain's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:37
TheBrain
If the winning song doesn't have a cool synthesized robot voice heads are going to roll.
BlueWolf72's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:43
BlueWolf72
ok well Ill get to work this is the commercial I made for Destructoid

click here

AngelsDontBurn's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:47
AngelsDontBurn
Aww you bastards! I was actually planning on having our band do a Destructoid song, especially after everyone told me to do so. Hahaha. But our drummer isn't going to be back for good until late August! Oh well, it'll still come anyway I'm sure. :)
Justice's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:49
Justice
I was actually thinking about a dtoid rap for a while
original music coming soon!
Kif 's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:50
Kif
Oh fuckwin. This contest owns.

I guarantee there will be a Rickroll with different lyrics.
Niero's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:57
Niero
haha I would love a rickroll version
Niero's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:57
Niero
A rap! Holy shit. This is gonna be hilarious.
BahamutZero's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 16:59
BahamutZero
why? are black people and culture inherently funny to you? That's racist!!!
BahamutZero's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 17:00
BahamutZero
and I'm doing a rickroll. with the same lyrics. nothing will change. but you will have to listen anyway.
Tempus's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 17:31
Tempus
Bahamut's RickRoll ftw. Though you should at least make a video man
Mxyzptlk's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 17:41
Mxyzptlk
Hooray, a contest that doesn't involve photoshop! Looking forward to the results of this!
BahamutZero's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 17:43
BahamutZero
bluewolf wins several internets for that ad. maybe a halo.
Kryptinite's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 17:50
Kryptinite
I'm on it.
MATTFOO's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 18:08
MATTFOO
HMMM A SONG...........
MATTFOO's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 18:09
MATTFOO
I DONT HAVE A XBOX.....
BlueWolf72's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 18:09
BlueWolf72
half way done... this is fun
monosylabik's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 18:12
monosylabik
hahahah i will win this.....i shall win.
but now i will go watch dawn of the dead.
atheistium's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 18:19
atheistium
Jim's already voted against me and those Mexicans just want to make me prom queen!
king3vbo's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 19:47
king3vbo
Wait I thought I already won this one a real long time ago :P

Great its time to bust out the guitars and synthesizers and the massive amounts of the alcohol and write a masterpiece
charliesuh's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 20:00
charliesuh
Yo Haley, there is already a Dtoid theme song, if not a couple, but there is that main one
Im OK's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 20:11
Im OK
@charliesuh

You mean the one that Haley linked to in the first sentence of his post?
Leon-G's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 21:45
Leon-G
Sorry to be a bit off topic but as long as we're talkin 'bout contests, William, would you be able to drop the date of the next portmanteau?
podobuzz's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 22:10
podobuzz
Destructoid gets +10 internets for the Dawn screencap.
William Haley's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/02/2007 22:43
William Haley
@Im OK, you know what? You're OK. =)

Leon, portmanteau's will be resuming within a week (eventually settling on Friday's or Thursdays permanently) and will become an ongoing feature. I'm glad you like it, it's fun seeing how people figure them out.
Roryzilla's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/03/2007 00:44
Roryzilla
Good thing I'm getting a synthesizer tomorrow. an alesis micron fyi. my friends have some circuit bent gameboys and nes'. i'll see what i can do. destructoid = win.
Justice's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/03/2007 02:48
Justice
If we're british and we win do we still get rock band?
Or do we get a UK specific prize which is a cup of tea and crumpets/scones
Alex's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/03/2007 07:04
Alex
My Girlfriend and me are on making the song with the DS (band brothers, homebrew drums and guitar) and with the bongos for the gamecube (donkey konga)

We will get the xbox360 shit! (want to buy a xbox 360 anyways..)
De-Filer's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/03/2007 09:57
De-Filer
The mystery box is probably a Dick in A Box. See here... http://youtube.com/watch?v=1dmVU08zVpA (Thank you SNL...)
William Haley's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/03/2007 13:08
William Haley
Extra points awarded to anyone who uses Mario Paint to make their song...
dprim3's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/03/2007 19:32
dprim3
I should do a Shatner-style spoken word version.

I know that if I don't at least win "most wtf?" I'll win gayest.
Founder's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/04/2007 01:07
Founder
<3 the reference to Se7en.
Mxyzptlk's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/06/2007 18:01
Mxyzptlk
Hey, a bump!
DJDuffy 's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/06/2007 18:58
DJDuffy
awesome! Good thing I've been taking guitar lessons...I'm going to attempt to rock your socks off
Savant's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/06/2007 19:14
Savant
I can be groupie... or a drum player. Whatever. :)
Pick me if you win!
king3vbo's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/06/2007 22:18
king3vbo
I gots an idea thats gonna rock your fuggin socks off
now I just need to stop drinking and start making it :P
Detry's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/07/2007 04:35
Detry
Boomp boomp boomp.

Be-bop be-bop be-bop be-bop be-bop.

DESTRUCTOID. BITCH.

Boomp boomp boomp.

Be-bop be-bop be-bop be-bop be-bop.

DESTRUCTOID.
king3vbo's Avatar - Comment posted on 07/08/2007 19:29
king3vbo
WTF? Am I really the first one to enter? I thought I was procrastinating... anyways

I gots 2. Heres a new one I made this afternoon (forgive me Im not much of a singer)

And here is the cover I did of the original Dtoid theme song a few months ago, I figure I would upload it for anyone that hasnt heard it/so I can win 2 prizes... (insert evil laugh)
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