Hey kids, do you want to look at something stupid this morning? Look no further than this juicy slice of video idiocy, courtesy of Battlefield 4 and AXE's pore-closin' smell juice!
Together, AXE and BF4 celebrate men and women working together in the field of conflict the only way they know how -- implied boning! So much boning will be going on, while shells detonate and comrades bleed from massive wounds all around them. They'll bone so hard you'll think they were made completely out of bones -- like the bloodstained bones jutting from severed limbs three feet away from their bangin' patch.
Are you shitting well turned on yet? You better be, you malingering tumors. It's AXE! The power of AXE! The sexual might and throbbing majesty of AXE! The slick, pulsating, quivering member of AXE! The engorged, gibbering, vomiting, stinking length of AXE!
It is AXE.
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9:00 AM on 03.23.2015