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Animal Crossing: Why Diva is a piece of sh*t

6:00 PM on 11.27.2013 // medo44

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[Happy Thanksgiving. --Mr Andy Dixon]

This is my first informational blog post about the piece of shit, Diva.

I understand I'm slightly late to the Animal Crossing bandwagon, however, picking up a game like New Leaf is actually out of the ordinary for me. I'm not really a "sims" guy and I don't really care for Tamagotchi, but I will go out of my way and change around my schedule just so I won't miss an "appointment" at someone's house later on in the day.

However, throughout my time playing, I was cursed with the demon, Diva. She is a purple, turd-covered frog who has an attitude that resembles a fat, angry, Walmart shopper.


Here she is claiming my girlfriend smokes marijuana

It's alarming how rude and disrespectful this lady is when it comes to feelings. On several occasions, I simply asked, "What's up?" and received a rebuttal along the lines of

"Fuck you. I hate your guts, Medo. You're a shitty mayor and I'm going to stay in your town as long as I want, even if you don't talk to me, write me letters, or suck my froggy dick."

After this was said, solitary confinement was obviously the only option.


Around 4PM


4:10PM


10:00PM

After a while, I decided to go check on her, as she seemed too content. I feel as if it's important to mention that Diva, after not talking to her for days on end, decided that she wanted to speak with me and try to sell me a painting, which of course (you probably guessed it) is fake. And of course my dumbass buys it for $5K.

My duties as mayor cannot tolerate her shit for much longer and she will not leave my town.

It is my new duty as mayor to not only pay off public works projects every day, but to mess with Diva every day.

I see trees in the future covering her dumb looking house.
I see gifts to her not getting to her,
I see lost items being fed to the shark in my room,
and I see death upon Diva.

She is not loved here.

Not nearly as much as Papi.



medo44,
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 Quickposts
Status updates from C-bloggers

Heat avatarHeat
He's best friends with Arioch!
Fuzunga avatarFuzunga
This thing finally arrived. Took forever!
SayWord avatarSayWord
Sorry guys and gals, this demon pussy is bestest.
ShadeOfLight avatarShadeOfLight
Just sayin'.
FakePlasticTree avatarFakePlasticTree
Best demon-girl, however, is obviously Shadow Labrys-cause shut up baby you know it!
SeymourDuncan17 avatarSeymourDuncan17
Also, Jonathan is best mainline SMT waifu. He can instill his Law within me anytime.
Serethyn avatarSerethyn
Anyone who doesn't like Pyro Jack?
Parismio avatarParismio
Please all your demons are dumb. They're dumb demons. Behold the magnificence of OSE!
SeymourDuncan17 avatarSeymourDuncan17
Mother Harlot is another SMT favorite of mine. I've never used her, but look at that shit. A holy skeleton sipping a golden chalice and riding a red, seven-headed hyena!
Torchman avatarTorchman
http://gonintendo.com/stories/251731-fire-emblem-0-a-look-at-two-genei-ibun-roku-fe-cards COME ON NINTENDO. BRING THIS OVER. I WILL BUY ALL THE CARDS. I WILL MAKE YOU MEET YOUR PROFIT GOALS.
SayWord avatarSayWord
Saw this window painting at a local sushi restaurant, was to cute not to share!
Shinta avatarShinta
bigboss0110 avatarbigboss0110
I just went back to Devil May Cry 4: Special Edition and got to the part where you can switch to Trish, and holy fuck, she's amazing! I actually might like using her more than Vergil!
gajknight avatargajknight
My favourite SMT demon is Naoto.
TheBlondeBass avatarTheBlondeBass
Happy to see Niero being hard at work with hotly anticipated new features like adding old man eyes everywhere.
Mike Wallace avatarMike Wallace
MY FAVORITE SMT DEMON IS MISTER TORGUE BECAUSE CHINESE CARTOONS ARE FOR @%&#ING %&^$-BAGS! MOW-WOW MIDDLEY MIDDLEY MOW!
Torchman avatarTorchman
Pyro Jack is where it's at mofos
TheBlondeBass avatarTheBlondeBass
If you don't like Jack Frost the best I feel nothing but contempt towards you.
Batthink avatarBatthink
Regarding SMT favourites, mine is Succubus.
Gamemaniac3434 avatarGamemaniac3434
Hey, I here theres some premium blog o' mine just lying around the cblogs right now. Should go pick it up, while its still in stock-which is limited due to artificial scarcity. Also for favorite personas, I am also a big fan of samael. Cool design.
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