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A new Splatterhouse? What? YES! photo

Oh my God! I don't care that Splatterhouse 2 was one of the most frustrating gaming experiences of my life -- any title that features telekinetic hanging fetus zombies that you chainsaw to death is the pinnacle of videogame achievement. The news that a current-gen Splatterhouse game is actually being made has caused me to become so excited, I might just puke, here and now, all over my hands and keyboard.

EGM will have an exclusive first look at this retro revival, as one of old school gaming's most blood-soaked franchises gets a fresh coat of paint for the current generation. To whomever may be responsible for resurrecting this game, if you are reading this, let it be known that I will have your babies -- morality and biological impossibilities be damned!

There'll be plenty of time for cynicism later, but right now, in my overexcited state, let me declare that this is going to be the GREATEST GAME EVER MADE!

[Thanks, DarkTravesty]


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next 50 comments

61 comments | showing # 1 to 50

MayorBee74's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 17:47
MayorBee74
A new Splatterhouse? Boner inducing, to say the least.
Shin Oni's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 17:48
Shin Oni
Something surpassing Jim's love for Dynasty Warriors? I must see this come about.

I always saw the Splatterhouse cabinets in arcades but...never did play it. I unno why.
peeetah's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 17:49
peeetah
Yes yes yes fuck YES. My parents actually bought me the first one when I was like 8 thought it was like the coolest thing ever at the time.
The-Excel's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 17:49
The-Excel
The mid-2000s is now officially the golden age of remakes.
MaxVest's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 17:50
MaxVest
Damn skippy. I hope it's so good that everyone tries to ban it.
Vlambo's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 17:52
Vlambo
So Jim, want me to send you a copy the 8 months we get it before you?
eternalplayer2345's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 17:53
eternalplayer2345
So let me gets this straight, we get annoucements of a brand new earthworm jim game the same day as a new splatterhouse *faints*
Passionate Styos's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 17:53
Passionate Styos
YES!!!! OH YES!!!!!!

Sorry, couldn't hold my orgasm. But damn, I'm already hyped for this! I loved the Genesis games. But since it's Namco-Bandai, I hope we don't get a second Soul Calibur Legends..*shrugs*
relik's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 17:54
relik
Oh the joy!
mix's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 17:55
mix
I have heard of this but I have never played it but if Jim is excited then by golly I am excited as well.
king3vbo's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 17:56
king3vbo
FUCK YEAH
peeetah's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 17:56
peeetah
Or the second even.
Nogarda's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:04
Nogarda
notice how when fox get a hold of this information they blow up at the violent videogame depicting [insert overstatement here] of the game but not a single MENTION of a bad word at friday the 13th. i'm not sure if one iteration of the game got banned in the uk or not but either way it didnt blame friday the 13th in anyway.

nothing ever changes.
aborto thefetus's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:04
aborto thefetus
Are those fetuses hanging from the wall?! Oh shit, I think I have a new avatar......
Aziel13's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:05
Aziel13
OMC
<3
Qraze's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:09
Qraze
awesome. wasn't this the first game in america to feature any kind of parental advisory box? (splatterhouse2 i believe)
DaedHead8's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:12
DaedHead8
This is relevant to my interests.
timtheterrible's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:15
timtheterrible
They aren't zombie feteuses, they're zombie babies! It's a zombie, not a choice.
Samit Sarkar's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:16
Samit Sarkar
@Qraze: According to Wikipedia, yes it was.
Dr Mike's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:17
Dr Mike
This rocks my face.

Maybe it's because my humor is on par with an 8 year old but I used to laugh (and still do) when you'd press up and it would look like you were chainsawing people with your jackson.
Seth338's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:20
Seth338
...
...
AWESOME - this was one of my favourite megadrive games.
bluemeep's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:21
bluemeep
Erection... Too sudden... Dizzy... Whoa, I gotta sit down...
the GAMEGOBLIN's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:31
the GAMEGOBLIN
FUCK YEAH
Ashley Davis's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:35
Ashley Davis
Just as long as Rick's mask doesn't turn pink again, they cannot mess this up. Boner!
Wiid Whacker's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:40
Wiid Whacker
BONAR!11!!
RitualNet's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:43
RitualNet
Never ever played the original. Is it on VC?
LongDeth's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:47
LongDeth
HOLY SHIT. I just had a nerdgasm.

Awesome avatar RitualNet, I loved that game.
Conrad Zimmerman's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:56
Conrad Zimmerman
This is the greatest day in the history of greatest days ever.
JTHomeslice's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:57
JTHomeslice
I came all over my computer again.
taumpytears's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:57
taumpytears
Will is bring tristero out of hiding?
forgotmypen's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 18:58
forgotmypen
does this mean i get to dropkick even MORE flying chairs? preorder confirmed!
But for the love of money, please don't make it an FPS.
SchickOuttaShape's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 19:05
SchickOuttaShape
hellz yay-uh-sssss!!!
Sam Spectre's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 19:13
Sam Spectre
blood!

I never played the original but it sounds awesome.
Im OK's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 19:15
Im OK
What is the probability that a new Splatterhouse game will get caught up in a retarded Manhunt 2-like fiasco involving the clueless non-gaming media? I'd say that probability is pretty close to 1.
SourGr8pes's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 19:24
SourGr8pes
A new Earthworm Jim AND Splatterhouse? Is this a planet where apes rule over man?? Was it Earth all along?!?

Oh, and this better be the goriest game I've ever played in my life. Like, so gory it will make me puke.
naib's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 19:53
naib
It better have a fetus spewing uterus for a boss.

*shakes fist*
DryvBy's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 20:21
DryvBy
Very, very cool.

/calls the news medias...
moot button's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 20:25
moot button
This one better have shoes, i'm not walking through that mess barefoot again
Tristero's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 20:38
Tristero
@taumpytears:

But I haven't been hiding. I've been here with you this whole time. “The years when you have seen only one set of footprints,
my child, is when I carried you.”
Qraze's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 20:48
Qraze
thanks samit.
DOOM's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 20:50
DOOM
MINE!!!!
bleep's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 20:54
bleep
whoa nice!
bleep's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 20:55
bleep
whoa nice!

also, Tristero is Buddha
AngelsDontBurn's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 21:10
AngelsDontBurn
HOLY FUCK MY PRAYERS HAVE FINALLY BEEN ANSWERED! OMFG! HOLY SHIT IM SO EXCITED GODDAMN THIS IS THE BEST YEAR EVER!
Tristero's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 21:26
Tristero
@Angels:

I have no doubt in my mind that this glorious day is due to your tireless campaigning. The gods have smiled upon us.
loki d20's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 22:11
loki d20
Played the first one when I was a kind on the Turbo. It was fun, and the only game I ever played on the Turbo. Don't know about the second one, but remakes seem to be a good way of going with XBLA/PSN games so far. As long as it isn't freaking 4:3.
c0dek's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 22:31
c0dek
Would You Like To Know More?

Yes, yes I would.
Trevor McGee's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 22:40
Trevor McGee
Fuck. Yes.

That is all that needs to be said.
brainderailment's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 23:13
brainderailment
May I slice fucked up fetuses in half with a chainsaw?
Noah's Avatar - Comment posted on 04/22/2008 23:45
Noah
\m/ (=_=) \m/
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