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Home Horror games updates

A new Splatterhouse? What? YES!
5:49 PM on 04.22.2008, Jim Sterling 61 comments

A new Splatterhouse? What? YES! photo
     Horror games

Oh my God! I don't care that Splatterhouse 2 was one of the most frustrating gaming experiences of my life -- any title that features telekinetic hanging fetus zombies that you chainsaw to death is the pinnacle of videogame achievement. The news that a current-gen Splatterhouse game is actually being made has caused me to become so excited, I might just puke, here and now, all over my hands and keyboard.

EGM will have an exclusive first look at this retro revival, as one of old school gaming's most blood-soaked franchises gets a fresh coat of paint for the current generation. To whomever may be responsible for resurrecting this game, if you are reading this, let it be known that I will have your babies -- morality and biological impossibilities be damned!

There'll be plenty of time for cynicism later, but right now, in my overexcited state, let me declare that this is going to be the GREATEST GAME EVER MADE!

[Thanks, DarkTravesty]


Next page: More DO WANT stories




peeetah's Avatar
peeetah at 04/22/2008 17:49
Yes yes yes fuck YES. My parents actually bought me the first one when I was like 8 thought it was like the coolest thing ever at the time.
The-Excel's Avatar
The-Excel at 04/22/2008 17:49
The mid-2000s is now officially the golden age of remakes.
MaxVest's Avatar
MaxVest at 04/22/2008 17:50
Damn skippy. I hope it's so good that everyone tries to ban it.
Vlambo's Avatar
Vlambo at 04/22/2008 17:52
So Jim, want me to send you a copy the 8 months we get it before you?
eternalplayer2345's Avatar
eternalplayer2345 at 04/22/2008 17:53
So let me gets this straight, we get annoucements of a brand new earthworm jim game the same day as a new splatterhouse *faints*
Passionate Styos's Avatar
Passionate Styos at 04/22/2008 17:53
YES!!!! OH YES!!!!!!

Sorry, couldn't hold my orgasm. But damn, I'm already hyped for this! I loved the Genesis games. But since it's Namco-Bandai, I hope we don't get a second Soul Calibur Legends..*shrugs*
relik's Avatar
relik at 04/22/2008 17:54
Oh the joy!
mix's Avatar
mix at 04/22/2008 17:55
I have heard of this but I have never played it but if Jim is excited then by golly I am excited as well.
king3vbo's Avatar
king3vbo at 04/22/2008 17:56
FUCK YEAH
peeetah's Avatar
peeetah at 04/22/2008 17:56
Or the second even.
Nogarda's Avatar
Nogarda at 04/22/2008 18:04
notice how when fox get a hold of this information they blow up at the violent videogame depicting [insert overstatement here] of the game but not a single MENTION of a bad word at friday the 13th. i'm not sure if one iteration of the game got banned in the uk or not but either way it didnt blame friday the 13th in anyway.

nothing ever changes.
aborto thefetus's Avatar
aborto thefetus at 04/22/2008 18:04
Are those fetuses hanging from the wall?! Oh shit, I think I have a new avatar......
Aziel13's Avatar
Aziel13 at 04/22/2008 18:05
OMC
<3
Qraze's Avatar
Qraze at 04/22/2008 18:09
awesome. wasn't this the first game in america to feature any kind of parental advisory box? (splatterhouse2 i believe)
DaedHead8's Avatar
DaedHead8 at 04/22/2008 18:12
This is relevant to my interests.
timtheterrible's Avatar
timtheterrible at 04/22/2008 18:15
They aren't zombie feteuses, they're zombie babies! It's a zombie, not a choice.
Samit Sarkar's Avatar
Samit Sarkar at 04/22/2008 18:16
@Qraze: According to Wikipedia, yes it was.
Dr Mike's Avatar
Dr Mike at 04/22/2008 18:17
This rocks my face.

Maybe it's because my humor is on par with an 8 year old but I used to laugh (and still do) when you'd press up and it would look like you were chainsawing people with your jackson.
Seth338's Avatar
Seth338 at 04/22/2008 18:20
...
...
AWESOME - this was one of my favourite megadrive games.
bluemeep's Avatar
bluemeep at 04/22/2008 18:21
Erection... Too sudden... Dizzy... Whoa, I gotta sit down...
the GAMEGOBLIN's Avatar
the GAMEGOBLIN at 04/22/2008 18:31
FUCK YEAH
Ashley Davis's Avatar
Ashley Davis at 04/22/2008 18:35
Just as long as Rick's mask doesn't turn pink again, they cannot mess this up. Boner!
Wiid Whacker's Avatar
Wiid Whacker at 04/22/2008 18:40
BONAR!11!!
RitualNet's Avatar
RitualNet at 04/22/2008 18:43
Never ever played the original. Is it on VC?
LongDeth's Avatar
LongDeth at 04/22/2008 18:47
HOLY SHIT. I just had a nerdgasm.

Awesome avatar RitualNet, I loved that game.
Conrad Zimmerman's Avatar
Conrad Zimmerman at 04/22/2008 18:56
This is the greatest day in the history of greatest days ever.
JTHomeslice's Avatar
JTHomeslice at 04/22/2008 18:57
I came all over my computer again.
taumpytears's Avatar
taumpytears at 04/22/2008 18:57
Will is bring tristero out of hiding?
forgotmypen's Avatar
forgotmypen at 04/22/2008 18:58
does this mean i get to dropkick even MORE flying chairs? preorder confirmed!
But for the love of money, please don't make it an FPS.
SchickOuttaShape's Avatar
SchickOuttaShape at 04/22/2008 19:05
hellz yay-uh-sssss!!!
Sam Spectre's Avatar
Sam Spectre at 04/22/2008 19:13
blood!

I never played the original but it sounds awesome.
Im OK's Avatar
Im OK at 04/22/2008 19:15
What is the probability that a new Splatterhouse game will get caught up in a retarded Manhunt 2-like fiasco involving the clueless non-gaming media? I'd say that probability is pretty close to 1.
SourGr8pes's Avatar
SourGr8pes at 04/22/2008 19:24
A new Earthworm Jim AND Splatterhouse? Is this a planet where apes rule over man?? Was it Earth all along?!?

Oh, and this better be the goriest game I've ever played in my life. Like, so gory it will make me puke.
naib's Avatar
naib at 04/22/2008 19:53
It better have a fetus spewing uterus for a boss.

*shakes fist*
DryvBy's Avatar
DryvBy at 04/22/2008 20:21
Very, very cool.

/calls the news medias...
moot button's Avatar
moot button at 04/22/2008 20:25
This one better have shoes, i'm not walking through that mess barefoot again
Tristero's Avatar
Tristero at 04/22/2008 20:38
@taumpytears:

But I haven't been hiding. I've been here with you this whole time. “The years when you have seen only one set of footprints,
my child, is when I carried you.”
Qraze's Avatar
Qraze at 04/22/2008 20:48
thanks samit.
DOOM's Avatar
DOOM at 04/22/2008 20:50
MINE!!!!
bleep's Avatar
bleep at 04/22/2008 20:54
whoa nice!
bleep's Avatar
bleep at 04/22/2008 20:55
whoa nice!

also, Tristero is Buddha
AngelsDontBurn's Avatar
AngelsDontBurn at 04/22/2008 21:10
HOLY FUCK MY PRAYERS HAVE FINALLY BEEN ANSWERED! OMFG! HOLY SHIT IM SO EXCITED GODDAMN THIS IS THE BEST YEAR EVER!
Tristero's Avatar
Tristero at 04/22/2008 21:26
@Angels:

I have no doubt in my mind that this glorious day is due to your tireless campaigning. The gods have smiled upon us.
loki d20's Avatar
loki d20 at 04/22/2008 22:11
Played the first one when I was a kind on the Turbo. It was fun, and the only game I ever played on the Turbo. Don't know about the second one, but remakes seem to be a good way of going with XBLA/PSN games so far. As long as it isn't freaking 4:3.
c0dek's Avatar
c0dek at 04/22/2008 22:31
Would You Like To Know More?

Yes, yes I would.
Trevor McGee's Avatar
Trevor McGee at 04/22/2008 22:40
Fuck. Yes.

That is all that needs to be said.
brainderailment's Avatar
brainderailment at 04/22/2008 23:13
May I slice fucked up fetuses in half with a chainsaw?
Noah's Avatar
Noah at 04/22/2008 23:45
\m/ (=_=) \m/
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