Roll up, roll up one and all, and come bear witness to the greatest cavalcade of videogaming curiosities known to modern man. We've got freaks, we've got geeks, we've got things the mere sight of which will make your eyes bleed, and they're all yours for the paltry price of a click.
Actually that's a lie, but we do have another gamer species described and analysed for your persual, education and edification, as is customary around this time of the week.
What do you say, click and jump?
#11 - The Collecting Gamer
Human beings like having lots of material possesions around us. This is a fact. Evolving as a hunter-gatherer species with a pack mentality, we've always liked to go out into the world and claim little pieces of it as our own in order to bring them back home to addorn the metaphorical cave. We like to stamp our mark on the planet by finding the things within it that appeal to us and making them ours, and we complete this assertion of identity by using these things, be they food, tools, materials, or merely trinkets, to provide for our pack, improve our living conditions and personalize our surroundings. When it isn't taken to the hedonistic extreme of greed, this process is a perfectly benevolent one, existing only to improve life for ourselves and our people and to make physical our psychological identities.
"1-up, you say? Whatever could that mean?"
But then he noticed his lives-count and suddenly all became clear. That non-existent currency had provided him with extended play-time, an actual, tangible bonus in his material life. His real-world habits had paid off in the virtual world, and suddenly his gaming style changed forever.
And the collections don't even have to be visible. While the constant increasing of his currency stash is like a never-ending, ever-improving hand-job, EXP is just as legitimate a collection, with each levelling-up being all the reward he needs go go out and fight for more. "Why?", he wonders, "Why oh why do they call it level-grinding when it's such a constant pleasure?" The only sadness he ever suffers from an RPG is when he realizes his collections are limited by the inevitable maxing out of the in-game counters, but hell, that's what expansion packs are for. Downloadable content was invented for this man.
And absolutely, positively, under no circumstances ever say "Yes" if he wants to show you his Pokemans. Not if you have anything else you want to do with the rest of your life.
Chapter 1 - Back-Seat Gamers and Closet Gamers
Chapter 2 - Chav Gamers
Chapter 3 - Fluffy Gamers and PC Snobs
Chapter 4 - Technical Gamers and Japanophiles
Chapter 5 - Aggressive Gamers and Ghosts
Chapter 6 - The One Game Gamer
Videogames are great, right? We all know that. To the average player they bring fun, stimulation and cameraderie, demanding only the occasional sleepless night and mild case of carpal tunnel syndrome in payment for the big fa...more
Roll up, roll up one and all, and come bear witness to the greatest cavalcade of videogaming curiosities known to modern man. We've got freaks, we've got geeks, we've got things the mere sight of which will make your eyes ble...more
Once again, it's Thursday, meaning the time has come to roll out this week's chapter of the Guide. Follow me through the jump, where you'll find another gamer archetype analyzed, scrutinized, dissected*, and moderately lampoo...more