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DESTRUCTOID, EST. IN 2006, IS AN INDEPENDENT NEWS COMPANY. WE ARE GAME CRITICS. OUR COMMUNITY IS RAW, VOCAL, AND HARDCORE <3
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3:45 PM on 02.13.2014

Videogame Clubhouse: The Valentine's Day special

It's time for that annual occurrence of public shame and humiliation: Valentine's Day. If that sentence wasn't enough to tip you off then know that I'm not a big fan of the holiday. So what is a guy to do to prepare himself f...

Spencer Hayes


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Which Console watches more Porn, BF4 Fixes & FFVIII Hair photo
Which Console watches more Porn, BF4 Fixes & FFVIII Hair
by Max Scoville

Hey hey! This video was supposed to go up yesterday afternoon, but a series of unfortunate events resulted in it going up very late last night, and then internet witchcraft prevented me from putting up a post. So, if you don't mind a little reheated day-old news, here ya go. CUT ME SOME SLACK I'M DOING THIS ALL ON MY OWN.

We got an amazing exclusive scoop thanks to Pornhub, EA has told DICE to fix Battlefield 4 before making any new DLC, cops busted up a dude's World of Warcraft livestream after a phony tip, Riot Games' contracts with eSports iJocks apparently prevent them from streaming Fat Princess and Final Fantasy VIII is now on Steam.

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The Destructoid Show: The Next Generation photo
The Destructoid Show: The Next Generation
by Max Scoville

Well, well. Look who's come crawling back. ME.

If you guys have been keeping track, The Destructoid Show came to an end two months ago, and I announced my departure from Revision3 about one month ago. And today, in an effort to further confuse my extended family who were never entirely sure what my job was to begin with, I'm proud to announce that I am back with Destructoid, full-time, as their head warlock of video-related crap -- which will include, in some form, a resurrection of the Destructoid Show.

To kick this off, please join me this Friday at 3:30 PM Pacific time (-8:00 GMT) on YouTube for a LIVE Destructoid Show. Y'know, for old time's sake.

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The Destructoid Show's Final Episode photo
The Destructoid Show's Final Episode
by Max Scoville

Well, guys. This is it. The final episode. Tara and I run down a whole bunch of our favorite moments from hosting this insane show.

I've been involved in this site for a bit over three years, and it's been nothing short of life-changing. Thank you guys so much for watching our show, and even if you didn't watch it, thanks for being a part of such an amazing community. Tara and I might be gone from Destructoid, but we'll still be doing plenty of video stuff on Rev3Games, so come say hello. And, of course, The Dtoid YouTube channel is still alive and well, as I'm sure you guys are all well aware.

Once again, thank you. Thank you to Niero and company for giving us a chance to do something so cool, which has somehow turned into a full-blown career path, and thanks to all of you guys who supported us along the way. I'm pretty good at puns and bad jokes, but effectively conveying how grateful I am for where this amazing video game website has taken me is a bit beyond my grasp. In a nutshell: I love you all more than pizza.

I have to go now, my planet needs me. (Also, I'm probably gonna start crying.)

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8:30 PM on 06.21.2013

No Xbox One DRM, Titanfall, Halo, & Oculus Rift VR Sex

Hey everybody! It's The Destructoid Show! ...Again! Microsoft dropped their dumb DRM, but there's a day one patch, and we're losing some features. But hey, free Xbox Live games. Titanfall has no single-player campaign, ...

Max Scoville



Review: Robot Unicorn Attack 2 photo
Review: Robot Unicorn Attack 2
by Tony Ponce

Robot Unicorn Attack will forever hold a special place in my heart. I remember PAX East 2010, meeting many Dtoiders for the first time, and joining a rousing drunken chorus of Erasure's "Always" in the late hours of the evening. I have an auto-runner Flash game featuring the heavenly music of a British synthpop band to thank for that.

Publisher Adult Swim Games knew it had a hit on its hand and did what any company in possession of a deliriously hot property would do: rehash the mother-loving piss out of it. There are no less than five variants of Robot Unicorn Attack on the Adult Swim game portal, each identical to the original aside from a graphical re-skin and other infinitesimal changes. It became the Oreo cookie of browser games, re-surfacing every few months with a different seasonal creme filling color (yeah, I know distinct Oreo creme flavors exist, but I'm trying to make a point here).

Robot Unicorn Attack 2 takes that famous Oreo flavor and makes a slamming Oreo milkshake, a concoction far greater than the sum of its parts. All the fun, all the magic, all the sugary sweetness, all the dolphins, now as a frosty beverage!

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8:30 PM on 12.17.2012

The DTOID Show: VR Porno, Tomb Raider & Dark Souls

It's Destructoid's sexiest episode ever! Well, Sessiest, anyway. Tara's out sick, so Adam Sessler's filling in. News includes interactive porno for the Oculus Rift by way of a company called Sinful Robot, some new Tomb Raider gameplay, and the top 5 sexiest Final Fantasy characters who are dudes. Plus: Dark Souls II is too easy, everyone get upset.

Max Scoville

4:45 PM on 11.05.2012

Destructoid Mobile has been redesigned, go play

We've been promising you a better mobile for ages, and it's finally here.  You can now use virtually all of the features of our desktop site on our new smartphone site. No apps to download, no nonsense to install, no gim...

Niero Gonzalez

7:30 PM on 07.16.2012

The DTOID Show: Adventure Time, Deadpool, & Spider-Boobs

Holy crap guys, I think this might be my favorite episode of the show we've done in ages. Like, just in terms of the pure awesomeness/absurdity of today's news. For starters, the ESRB has described all the awful things that a...

Max Scoville

8:00 PM on 07.06.2012

The DTOID Show: Halo, Walking Dead, & Secret World of BJs

Hey guys! If you missed today's LIVE Destructoid Show, here's a nice convenient recording of it for you to watch.  For starters, NiGHTS Into Dreams and Dragonball Z Budokai are both getting HD rereleases, and Final ...

Max Scoville

3:45 PM on 06.27.2012

Buy a Balloonicorn and you too can believe in magic

You've watched the magic. Now live the magic! To celebrate the release of "Meet the Pyro," ThinkGeek is selling a three-foot tall Balloonicorn straight from your dreams and into your bedroom. It's pink, it's ballooney, and it...

Tony Ponce





9:30 PM on 08.25.2011

The DTOID Show is LIVE from PAX right NOW

Hey guys! Heads up! We're in Seattle for PAX right now, sweaty and exhausted. In just a few moments, we'll be streaming LIVE, going over some of the... things... that we're doing. Just waiting for Tara to finish her pizza. G...

Max Scoville

1:30 PM on 08.18.2011

Saints Row The Third writer talks dildos, boobs & Shaundi

Gah, finally. I've been wanting to talk about Saints Row: The Third since last Friday, and yesterday the embargo was finally up. I got to talk to Drew Holmes, the game's lead narrative designer (or "writer") about all the wo...

Max Scoville

11:45 AM on 08.04.2011

That bear is wearing a bikini ...

What you are looking at is a piece of art for Super Danganronpa 2. The character is called Mono Bear and he is evil, as you can tell from the fact that he's WEARING A BIKINI OH GOD.  Since the first game never made ...

Jim Sterling

3:00 PM on 07.19.2011

Winners of The Destructoid Show's 3DS Destruction Contest

If you watch The Destructoid Show, you'll know we've been doing a contest to give away three Catalyst 3DS cases, sponsored by the fine folks at CM4. Of course, since we're a gaggle of idiot children, the contest was "make a p...

Max Scoville

11:30 PM on 07.15.2011

New Destructoid Episode: Metro Dorito Aliens Having Sex

Hey kid, wanna see a dead body? Oh. Well. You wanna see some really cool video game news... In the back of my van? Uh. Anyway. The guy from Crytek says the PS Vita is gonna fail, and the guy from Naughty Dog says the Wii U i...

Max Scoville