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5 SNES Games That Curb-Stomped My Arse

3:59 PM on 07.16.2006, backflip10019 0 comments

     Platform games
Throughout my travels as a game connoisseur, I have come along many difficult games that have made me want to scream, shoot someone, and even cry sometimes. However, these 5 following games are the most difficult Super NES games that I have encountered; all of them have made me want to curb stomp someone a la American History X. Smashtv.png 5. Super Smash TV - Difficulty: 7/10 Evading aliens? Nope. Taking on the entire Chinese army by yourself? Much harder than that. Taking place on the set of a futuristic game show, Super Smash TV boasted thousands of enemies per level, circling you in, ready to eat out your heart. Sounds a little more difficult than MXC, doesn't it? It actually sounds like it would make a sick Fox reality TV show (they've already had midgets pull a plane against an elephant). Completing this game by yourself was like pulling out all the hairs on your leg one by one with a small pair of tweezers. "Total carnage! I love it!" StarFoxSNES.jpg> 4. Star Fox (SNES) - Difficulty: 7.5/10 Now where to begin with this one? Maybe with the horrid graphics that made it look like you were flying through some kind of acid trip. Is that triangular pixel a powerup or a bad guy? It really didn't make a difference since it was practically impossible to get past the first level. Apparently your partners, Slippy, Falco and Peppy, are supposed to help you get through each level by shooting down baddies. In actuality, these poor excuses for pixelated animals just get in the way and annoy the living hell out of you. One of the most satisfying things in this game is shooting down your partners when they ask for help. "Croak! Help me!" Help this, mother****er. contraIII.gif> 3. Contra III: Alien Wars - Difficulty: 8/10 Despite the fact that you are armed to the teeth in Contra III, the difficulty is simply unmanageable. Some may say that Contra III's predecessors are more difficult, but this one actually put me on the verge of tears. Even with the help of a buddy and 7 lives each, the task of run and gunning a slew of aliens was daunting. When I first picked this game up, the first level had me begging for mercy - those damn robot-guys and vicious werewolf baddies were too much. I never did understand why it was called Alien Wars. Thats probably because I was stuck fighting those robots and dog-things on the first level and never got far enough to actually fight any actual aliens. It's a good thing that Konami turned to making easier games -- TMNT IV: Turtles in Time gave me a new hope. GhoulsNGhosts.jpg> 2. Super Ghouls & Ghosts - Difficulty: 9/10 Two hits and you die. That's right, just two hits. Arthur's flashy boxers weren't even enough to save you. This game is ridiculous - there are tons of different types of undead baddies that all have different ways of attacking you. Even though there are a few different weapons that can easily flay these baddies alive, they're difficult to get, as random weapons appear in chests around each level. Over the past 12 or so years, I've never been able to beat the first level legitly - the bosses of each level are enormous and deathtastic. And yeah, deathtastic is a word. Battletoads.jpg> 1. Battletoads in Battlemaniacs - Difficulty: 10/10 The two main characters may have the sweetest names out of any game ever created, Pimple and Rash, but this game is ****ing ridiculous! It is IMPOSSIBLE to do it by yourself - you need a buddy in order to complete just the first level. The enemies simply do not die. You have to hit them with special moves (which I could never figure out how to perform) in order to kill them. Common enemies in the first level include skeletons and crazy fast-running black pigs that jump out of the air and crush you with their voluptuous beer-bellies. The bosses are enormous and take major skill to defeat and make you want to pull out your hair and burn it in a sacrimonial fashion. What are the most difficult SNES games that our readers have ever played?

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