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'Meet' Bruce Willis in Second Life ... or not, y'know photo

Ever wanted to pretend to meet Bruce Willis? Now you can! To celebrate the upcoming release of Live Free or Die Hard, those fellas at Fox are offering contestants a chance to meet with Mr. McClane himself, to lucky winners with the inclination and time on their hands to take the Die Hard Fan Quiz.

Why am I wasting everybody's time talking about that? Because you won't get to physically meet him. Instead, you will have the distinct pleasure of chatting with the man through the medium of Second Life.

That's right, the "3D Virtual World" used predominantly (if not exclusively) as a global virtual sex marathon will host a clandestine meeting with the action movie star Bruce Willis or, more accurately, a hairy, greasy pedophile claiming to be Bruce Willis.  

If your life's ambition has been to answer five questions about Die Hard in order to speak to somebody who thinks they're Bruce Willis over the internet, then this is the contest of your dreams. Why, they'll even make the Second Life account for you.

I know you're tempted ... you're gagging for it.

[Thanks to Knives]

 






Contests Official Rules



No Purchase Required to Enter or Win

1. Eligibility: Destructoid.com contests are usually provided by sponsors who, due to customs and shipping costs (yay budgets), often limit participation to individuals who are legal residents of the fifty (50) United States (unless otherwise stated) and are 12 years of age. We encourage our overseas friends to be super sneaky and make a friend in the United States who can receive your prize, and then you two figure out the customs/logistics. Be cautious about who you trust, obviously. Employees of destructoid.com, their advertising or promotion agencies, those involved in the production, development, implementation or handling of Contests, any agents acting for, or on behalf of the above entities, their respective parent companies, officers, directors, subsidiaries, affiliates, licensees, service providers, prize suppliers any other person or entity associated with the Contests (collectively “Contest Entities”) and/or the immediate family (spouse, parents, siblings and children) and household members (whether related or not) of each such employee, are *not* eligible and will be fired and publicly beaten if are caught participating. All U.S., federal, state and local and regulations apply.

2. Agreement to Official Rules: Participation in the Contest constitutes entrant’s full and unconditional agreement to and acceptance of these Official Rules and the decisions of the Sponsor, which are final and binding. Winning a prize is contingent upon fulfilling all requirements set forth herein.

3. Entry Period: The start and end dates/times of each Contest (the “Entry Period”) will be posted on the applicable Contest site.

4. Entry: To enter a Contest, follow the instructions on the Contest site. Submission will result in one (1) entry. The number of times you can enter the Contest will be posted on the applicable Contest site. The use of any agencies or automated software to submit entries will void all entries submitted by that person.

5. Drawing: At the conclusion of the Entry Period, we will select the names of the potential winners in a random drawing of all eligible entries received during each Entry Period. The number of winners to be selected in a specific Contest will be posted on the applicable Contest site. The odds of being selected as a potential winner depend on the number of eligible entries received during the Entry Period. Potential winners will be contacted via email and will be asked to provide their full name, age and mailing address within a specified time period. If a potential winner does not respond within the timeframe stated in the notification email, we may select an alternate potential winner in his/her place at random from all entries received during the Entry Period. Limit one (1) prize per household per Contest.

6. Requirements of the Potential Winners: Winners will be notified by the e-mail address associated with their account on destructoid.com.com and/or receive a Private Message on destructoid.com.com or through a Twitter Direct Message/Facebook message. Winners have five (5) days from the original message alerting them of their winnings to respond and claim their prize. If no winner comes forward within five business days, the prize will be forfeited and raffled again where Destructoid's hardcore fans are most active (forums/community blogs/facebook group).

7. Prize(s): The prize(s) (including each prize’s approximate retail value) available to be won in a specific Contest will be posted on the Contest site. No cash or other substitution may be made, except by the Sponsor, who reserves the right to substitute a prize with another prize of equal or greater value if the prize is not available for any reason as determined by the Sponsor in its sole discretion. The winners are responsible for any taxes and fees associated with receipt or use of a prize. Prizes will be mailed between 1 to 45 business days after winners have replied with their required info.

8. General Conditions: In the event that the operation, security, or administration of the Contest is impaired in any way for any reason, including, but not limited to fraud, virus, or other technical problem, the Sponsor may, in its sole discretion, either: (a) suspend the Contest to address the impairment and then resume the Contest in a manner that best conforms to the spirit of these Official Rules; or (b) award the prizes at random from among the eligible entries received up to the time of the impairment. The Sponsor reserves the right in its sole discretion to disqualify any individual it finds to be tampering with the entry process or the operation of the Contest or to be acting in violation of these Official Rules or in an unsportsmanlike or disruptive manner. Any attempt by any person to undermine the legitimate operation of the Contest may be a violation of criminal and civil law, and, should such an attempt be made, the Sponsor reserves the right to seek damages from any such person to the fullest extent permitted by law. The Sponsor’s failure to enforce any term of these Official Rules shall not constitute a waiver of that provision. In case of a dispute as to the owner of an entry, entry will be deemed to have been submitted by the authorized account holder of the screen name from which the entry is made. The authorized account holder is defined as the natural person who is assigned to an e-mail address by an Internet access provider, online service provider, or other organization responsible for assigning e-mail addresses for the domain associated with the submitted e-mail address.

9.Release and Limitations of Liability: By participating in the Contest, entrants agree to release and hold harmless the Contest Entities from and against any claim or cause of action arising out of participation in the Contest or receipt or use of any prize, including, but not limited to: (a) unauthorized human intervention in the Contest; (b) technical errors related to computers, servers, providers, or telephone or network lines; (c) printing errors; (d) lost, late, postage-due, misdirected, or undeliverable mail; (e) errors in the administration of the Contest or the processing of entries; or (f) injury or damage to persons or property which may be caused, directly or indirectly, in whole or in part, from entrant’s participation in the Contest or receipt of any prize. Entrant further agrees that in any cause of action, the Contest Entities’ liability will be limited to the cost of entering and participating in the Contest, and in no event shall the Contest Entities be liable for attorney’s fees. Entrant waives the right to claim any damages whatsoever, including, but not limited to, punitive, consequential, direct, or indirect damages.

10. Disputes: Except where prohibited, entrant agrees that any and all disputes, claims and causes of action arising out of, or connected with, the Contest or any prize awarded shall be resolved individually, without resort to any form of class action. All issues and questions concerning the construction, validity, interpretation and enforceability of these Official Rules, entrant’s rights and obligations, or the rights and obligations of the Sponsors in connection with the Contest, shall be governed by, and construed in accordance with, the laws of the Commonwealth of Virginia, without giving effect to any choice of law or conflict of law rules (whether of the Commonwealth of Virginia or any other jurisdiction), which would cause the application of the laws of any jurisdiction other than the Commonwealth of Virginia.

11. Contest Results: To enter the contest without needing to buy/sell anything or request a written copy of the name of the winners, send a self-addressed stamped envelope (stating the specific Contest you are requesting the winners for) to destructoid.com Contest Winners 260 King Street Suite 883, San Francisco California 94107. We run many contests, so please be specific in what you are requesting. Winner requests must be received within thirty (30) days from the end date of the applicable contest (they're always posted on our site though). Winners are usually posted the day following the contest on our contest section.

Lastly, Destructoid has the right to kick your ass and take away your prize if you are a total dickhead, so be cool and don't kick any puppies on your way to victory. Have fun with our contests and be a good sport when you win or lose. Remember: First you get the power, then you get the money, then get the baby.

 




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Jim Sterling serves as reviews editor for Destructoid.com, head of the Podtoid podcast, and produces a number of news stories, original features, one-of-a-kind videos. With his passionate argumentative style, controversial opinions, harsh delivery, and dedication to brutal honesty Sterling is a name that you can't help but recognize. Likes PS2, iPod Touch, Silent Hill 2, Metal Gear Solid, Dynasty Warriors 3 Meet the rest of the team



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26 comments | showing # 1 to 26
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Jecrell's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 07:36
Jecrell
If you're reading this and you're Bruce Willis -- kill yourself now -- unless you like furries.
Kif 's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 07:58
Kif
In before "Who the fuck is Jim Sterling?" :)

And Jecrell hit the nail right on the head. Bruce man, this is a new low. If John McClane were real, he'd kill every furry on that game he could see.
bhive01's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 08:02
bhive01
Let me show you them!

BahamutZero's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 08:27
BahamutZero
I read he personally responded to some forum trolls criticizing live free or die hard, and when they were like "you're not fucking bruce willis" he did a live video chat with one of them... either he's the man or he's fucking crazy
tazarthayoot's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 08:36
tazarthayoot
@Bahamut

If that's true, I have lost all the respect I used to have for him.

Not that I had very much to begin with.
Rockvillian's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 08:36
Rockvillian
If he makes his appearance R rated (explosions and blowing fuckers heads off) I'll forgive him
BahamutZero's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 08:38
BahamutZero
who the fuck is Bruce Willis?
falthorn's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 08:43
falthorn
Does it worry anyone else that they ask for your physical address and age following the rigorous mental gauntlet? Bruce is cool and all, I just don't want him coming over and sleeping on my couch.

@Bahamut_Zero: You know, he's the guy from that video game: http://www.destructoid.com/games-time-forgot-apocalypse-30904.phtml
BluDesign's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 08:47
BluDesign
I wouldn't have bothered responding to message board people. Half the time, they're uninformed halfwits who have no actual knowledge of what they're talking about.

I've met people who post regularly on AICN. They've never crossed paths with either soap or women in nigh on 30 years.
Moriarty is probably the cleanest and most approachable of the bunch of them.

As far as Bruce Willis is concerned, eh... I'm not sure meeting in a video game is the best way to reach out to your very diverse fanbase. Winning this contest is almost like receiving a 50% off coupon for a haircut, but it's only useable if you want a mullet, and the coupon expires today.
Jim Sterling's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 09:24
Jim Sterling
Buahaha, oh Bruce, have you nothing to do? Go for a bloody walk at least.
Nick Chester's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 09:30
Nick Chester
Bruce is a pretty big tech geek. Apparently he actually DOES play Second Life. He also had sex with Demi Moore, multiple times, which means he's one up on all of you guys.
Jim Sterling's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 09:35
Jim Sterling
Pfft, I've had sex with Demi Moore.
tazarthayoot's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 09:38
tazarthayoot
I had sex with Demi Moore vicariously through a screen cap of from Striptease and my hand. Does that count?
BahamutZero's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 09:43
BahamutZero
tazar he just wanted to show them his pokemans

tazarthayoot's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 09:44
tazarthayoot
That is the fucking greatest, Bahamut.
Jim Sterling's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 09:45
Jim Sterling
Bahamut_Zero wins.
BahamutZero's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 09:48
BahamutZero
thanks, my own 'leet work. I would have cloned out the tat and made it look real except my boss wants me to go play halo I mean get back to fucking work
Aaron Mxy Yost's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 10:26
Aaron Mxy Yost
It was on an Ain't It Cool talkback, and the best part was when one of the site writers repeatedly said it wasn't the real Bruce, only to get utterly pwned when he fired up iChat. He was actually pretty cool in the comments honestly, he didn't pull a Jaffe. Second Life is pretty much on the same level of suck as AICN, so it's really a lateral move.
MechaMonkey's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 10:34
MechaMonkey
Bahamut, when you poop does the excess awesome you produce get excreted, or do you save all the extra up to Hadoken those who defy you?

That picture secured you a place in Valhalla, where you can bone Valkyries and drink mead all day
ohgr89's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 10:53
ohgr89
Because... now I have a machine gun?
Namelessted's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 11:05
Namelessted
who the fuck is Jim Sterling?
Kif 's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 12:54
Kif
Why the hell does Bruce Willis care if some Second Life furry lovers hated Die Hard 4?
Ninjajuice66's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/15/2007 20:12
Ninjajuice66
"Get a First Life". I love that guy.
Knivy's Avatar - Comment posted on 05/16/2007 02:58
Knivy
So if we say he isn't Bruce Willis he might come and show us his pokemans? Did i get that right?
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