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Home Hardcore updates

"Dear Cosmo, I own every game ever made but am still a virgin. Help?"

4:57 AM on 06.12.2007, William Haley 44 comments


     Hardcore

Via IGN's "Ultimate Setup" series, Nate Polston has revealed to the world his 900+ game collection, and 30+ console collection. Aww Dark Wizard and Sonic CD... You remind me of a time when life was easier and games were harder. The collector claims Panzer Dragoon Saga is the pride of his collection, and why shouldn't it be? That game was the bomb son, and don't nod your head in agreement because you know you've never played it. In case you're wondering, Nate is 23 years old, lives in Arkansas (probably with this guy), and will likely never know the touch of a woman.

I make fun, but only because on the inside I'm wishing I had all this guy's stuff. I wouldn't even do anything with it, I'd just like to have it in my basement, locked away like some sort of horrible secret that the kid across the street knows about but no one will believe him because "Timmy, I already told you monsters don't exist! You're just acting out because your father died." But Timmy isn't going to listen, is he?

[Thanks to Cody Skidmore for the tip. I don't have a joke for this one, the kid's name is "Skidmore", hasn't he been through enough?]


LAUNCH GALLERY (11 IMAGES)
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Mr Fahrenheit's Avatar
Mr Fahrenheit at 06/12/2007 05:18
The dude has all of that... all of that... And still doesn't have a PS3. Not trying to say anything there... Just... Pointing it out.

Also, he should really have an HDTV. All of that stuff needs to be seen in widescreen, boy.
Holyetheline's Avatar
Holyetheline at 06/12/2007 05:33
And I thought I was the only one who had an Activator for the Sega.
Justice's Avatar
Justice at 06/12/2007 05:34
I have a dreamcast too!
Justice's Avatar
Justice at 06/12/2007 05:34
I have a dreamcast too!
Holyetheline's Avatar
Holyetheline at 06/12/2007 05:35
HOLY CRAP MR FAHRENHEIT IS RIGHT! THERE IS NO PS3 ANYWHERE... BAHAHAHAHA.
MF GRIMM's Avatar
MF GRIMM at 06/12/2007 05:57
All that stuff has got to be in his parents basement...

Nintendork's Avatar
Nintendork at 06/12/2007 06:03
Hey maybe if someone told Colette about his copy of Phantasy Star for the Master System, he may well one day feel the touch of a woman.
Jim Sterling's Avatar
Jim Sterling at 06/12/2007 07:00
Let us hate him.
Milofo's Avatar
Milofo at 06/12/2007 07:19
@Jim
No no, lets not hate him just steal from his rich ass. A guy with this many games has got to have a rich daddy or something in order to afford all of that.
Kryptinite's Avatar
Kryptinite at 06/12/2007 07:59
All of those games and that shitty ass TV.

Does not compute.
winojesus's Avatar
winojesus at 06/12/2007 08:10
remove a few cartridges and i'm sure you'd find all sorts of chopped up kiddies/cats/family members.
Vigor's Avatar
Vigor at 06/12/2007 08:10
uh yea..........
Mxyzptlk's Avatar
Mxyzptlk at 06/12/2007 08:19
Do want.
Megaphone's Avatar
Megaphone at 06/12/2007 08:44
He screams virgin, yet I am still jealous.
Colette Bennett's Avatar
Colette Bennett at 06/12/2007 08:52
DO WANT
Ness's Avatar
Ness at 06/12/2007 09:04
Wow... nice collection. O_____o
SLiFE's Avatar
SLiFE at 06/12/2007 09:11
You think he's played even half of 'em?
lowercaseluke's Avatar
lowercaseluke at 06/12/2007 09:17
Chuh, whatever. He doesn't even have the pink GameBoy Colour. Amateur.
michiyoyoshiku's Avatar
michiyoyoshiku at 06/12/2007 09:20
I vow I will have that collection

and every gameboy ever made
Teta's Avatar
Teta at 06/12/2007 09:26
I would sell half that stuff, keep the things i´m plating and buy me a new TV, or a car, can he afford a House with all that stuff, or maybe Ecuador?
BahamutZero's Avatar
BahamutZero at 06/12/2007 09:44
yeah but does he have bejeweled for his cellphone? I WIN!
BahamutZero's Avatar
BahamutZero at 06/12/2007 09:45
PS that is easily $75,000 worth of games
Vigor's Avatar
Vigor at 06/12/2007 09:55
He has all the xenosagas... So some of the games he has are horrible
FatBologna's Avatar
FatBologna at 06/12/2007 10:07
yeah yeah yeah. His DVD collection's quite lacking, though. Imagine all that times 2, and that's what my place looks like, but with dvds, and a fuckton of comic books. Although...you can't really get nearly as many hours of entertainment out of a dvd...I HATE HIM, MOMMY!!! I WANT IT! I WANT IT! I WANT IT!
10BobMarleys's Avatar
10BobMarleys at 06/12/2007 10:16
Oh dear, i seem to have soiled myself.
PappaDukes's Avatar
PappaDukes at 06/12/2007 10:21
Looks like the Angry Video Game Nerd is going to get ALOT more angrier. That is some wicked-stiff competition. Even has that busted non-HD contraption...
Christian's Avatar
Christian at 06/12/2007 10:37
Heck if I kept everything video game related I ever had instead of selling it for mad bank, I'd have a room that looked like that. At some point over the last 28 years I've owned just about everything in that room, except all the queer Pokemon shit.
tazarthayoot's Avatar
tazarthayoot at 06/12/2007 10:40
lol, who could tell he was an anime nerd too before even looking at the pics?
jerrt's Avatar
jerrt at 06/12/2007 10:42
man.... it is better than my collection. i've almost got as many consoles as he does, but i don't have nearly as many good old games but i started collecting much later than he apparently did. also he has alot more original boxes and extras. i probably have him beat on some accessories though.
SANE4LIFE's Avatar
SANE4LIFE at 06/12/2007 11:19
wow. he has to be a virgin.
atheistium's Avatar
atheistium at 06/12/2007 11:27
I'd sex him! And take him games, BWHAHAHAHAHAA

I got invisible aids :(
Kyuzo's Avatar
Kyuzo at 06/12/2007 11:58
He may have Panzer Dragoon Saga, but does he have Radiant Silvergun? I think not!
ohgr89's Avatar
ohgr89 at 06/12/2007 12:07
He has two def leppard dvds. I'm going to let my comments die there.
Andy_J's Avatar
Andy_J at 06/12/2007 13:11
But does he have AIDS? Gotta catch em all!!!
Jambo's Avatar
Jambo at 06/12/2007 13:27
Woot! how many gameboys!! and lol no PS3!!
Reeper's Avatar
Reeper at 06/12/2007 15:05
couldn't say just reeper?

...fuck.
CrakieRacooon's Avatar
CrakieRacooon at 06/12/2007 16:20
good god...There is a heaven on earth
Reeper's Avatar
Reeper at 06/12/2007 16:24
i bet you the way to this lair of unholy goodness is just like indianna jones.

idk what would set off the giant boulder though.
Ninjajuice66's Avatar
Ninjajuice66 at 06/12/2007 20:38
Virgins don't deserve to play Dreamcast.
robnittt's Avatar
robnittt at 06/12/2007 20:48
yeah, but is his Dreamcast from Japan? With Japanese Sonic? I think not. Bwahahaha. Loser.
marc's Avatar
marc at 07/04/2007 09:42
Yeah, a few people have got onto the fact this guy has a really crap taste in games apart from a couple of good rpg's and a few other bits and bats.........it's quality not quantity and you could find most of this crap in any sad casual game store.........where's your jap saturn with best games ever , wheres your pce with even more of the best games ever, where are any of the amazingly cool games from outa japan , no Neo Geo, no arcade boards....this is a waste of space....... this sort of crap sucks. More money than taste, a true geek.......... wheres your shooters? I'm outa here was expecting a good games collection not boot sale leftovers..........ah well.......sell your games and get some downtime with a hoe or somethin'.
Paulag17's Avatar
Paulag17 at 03/08/2009 18:55
Hmm, hes still a virgin!, cant think why!!...:P x
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